Sunday, July 31, 2011

Dear Pop Culture: The Clean Out

I will build that desk, one day
If the name of this blog doesn't give it away, I'm a pop culture lover! In particular films, TV shows and books - I guess it makes sense, I love storytelling in all forms. The problem being, across the years I've acquired a fair chunk of storytelling and I need to make room. If you can tell from this picture, I store my DVD's alphabetically (sub divided into TV series alphabetically) as well as my books. Thus begins the giant cull of '11. There a three key sections: Don't Touch, Staying for Sure; Hmm Do I Really Need It?; and I Can't Believe I Actually Still Have This. Across the next few weeks, we'll meet contenders for each section and you can let me know if I should toss or keep.

Let's meet our first entrants:

Book: Bridget Jones: Edge of Reason

Somehow I have the sequel and not the original Bridget Jones book, but let's not get sidetracked. I bought this in the US after falling in LOVE with the first film. From that moment on Mark Darcy was Colin Firth and the book was ignited with some extra spice purely because of that. However, the book does have problems, which I'm not addressing here because it's not a review. The biggest problem I have, is that Edge of Reason has been so horribly tainted by the second film. The one that includes the most awful Like a Virgin dance routine in the jail - yep, you blocked that out didn't you. It also overshadows some funny moments in the book, including Bridget getting a bullet sent in the mail and thinking it was a PR stunt and Mark Darcy come apart in front of her in a completely cute way. Do I go back and read key sections I like? Not so much anymore. As I said, all overshadowed by too much Hugh Grant and lesiban hijinks.

Verdict: Barely hanging onto Hmm Do I Need This Status?

DVD: Another Cinderella Story 2

Oh yes people, I have the good stuff. After the cinematic triumph of Cinderella Story with Chad Michael Murray and Hilary Duff (they were robbed at Academy's); how could I not buy the highly anticipated sequel. Starring Selena Gomez before she was pashfriends with Bieber and Andrew Seeley, the singing voice of Zac Efron from High School Musical (did I just break some bubbles there - Zac didn't sing so much in the first film.) It's horrifically bad, it involves a dance scene through a mirror, a cleaning sequence that of course turns into a dance scene and more non-sensical things turning into dance scenes. The chemistry between the leads in non-existent and it's basically pretty bad - in fact the front cover quote '...you'll be pleasantly surprised.' Chicago Tribune is my favourite thing, because even the reviewers admit how bad you're thinking it is.

Verdict: Firmly in the I Can't Believe I Have This (but secretly, it's so bad, it's good - could it stay?)

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Dawson's Creek FanFiction: Sailing Home

Title: Sailing Home
Pairing: Pacey and Joey
Rating: R - sex, nudity, drinking - everything the WB doesn't let its characters do
Summary: Post season 5, in which they tried to ignore the awesomeness of Pacey and Joey. 
Disclaimer: The WB owns them, I'm just taking them for a smutty walk
Author Note: Pacey, while minding a boat for a celebrity client, becomes a summer outlet for all the Capesiders, hope to escape the humdrum of their college life. 

Sailing Home

You’re unbelievable.” The voice cut through the summer heat like ice running through hell. Holding up his hands in mock defense he released the hose that he was using, but carefully placed it in reach.
“What are you doing here?” He replied.
“Shouldn’t I be asking you the same question, and whose boat is this?” She still remained strict but the smirk in her voice was creeping in.
“This boat happens to belong to one very famous and very unnamable booty shaking songstress who would like the $3.6 million she invested in this little number to be used. Hence I was asked to travel back to Boston collect said boat, and travel with said boat to where ever I please, with whom ever I please.”
“Are you serious?” She was losing her edge.
“Well I do have to be in Miami in the next two weeks to take the tourist for a run, but then the boat has to come back for winter docking.” His earnest explanation distracting her from her mission.
“But what are you doing here Miss. Potter?” He asked finally facing her.
“Hunting your ass down, on behalf of my room mate that is.” The steely glaze returned to her eyes.
“Oh that one.”
“Yes that one.”
“Well I would love nothing more than to rehash my summer implosion with you but there’s only one problem.” Joey missed the smirk.
“What’s that?”
“You need to cool down.” And with that he grabbed the hose and soaked Miss. Josephine Potter.

Lying on the huge sun deck in her bikini top and shorts, Joey smiled. This was the life, she had spent far too much time concentrating on things completely out of her control. She had been so busy focusing on what she wasn’t, she’d missed what she was. A nineteen year old girl heading into her second year at college with no real responsibilities. Why was she always placing incredible amounts of drama into her life?
“As ordered one strawberry Margarita,” Pacey placed the oversized glass in specially designed holder. Luxury was a burden.
“Pace, I asked for a beer.”
“Consider it an apology for soaking you,” he smiled, cracking his beer open.
“So honestly what are you doing here Potter, besides castrating me on behalf of Audrey?”
“Well that will come later.”
“I don’t doubt it.”
“Well, things didn’t quite go as planned this summer,” She grimaced.
“Last I heard it, Dawson had you flown out to LA to give ‘Joey and Dawson’ a go. I was waiting to see you two presenting an Emmy or something.”
“Not so much. We broke up.” She looked earnestly at Pacey. The silence stood between them, and then Pacey fell to the floor in a hysterical laughing fit.
“What?” She asked. Trying to regain his composure Pacey looked up at her, tears in his eyes.
“You mean, Dawson and Joey Version 5.9 didn’t work,” He began laughing again.
“What? We’re taking a break from each other.” Joey replied. Pacey laughed all the more at this insistence.
“What is so funny Pacey?”
“Nothing, I’m sorry it’s just…I’m mean come on.” He tried desperately to hold it together.
“What? We just need time apart to grow.” This caused another set of convulsions.
“Please Jo, you’re killing me.” Pacey raised his hand, pleading for her to stop.
“Witter what is so damn hysterical about Dawson and I breaking up?”
“Well we are at break up number what? Five or six. And the almost, nearly, pinning desperately for the other moments has to be in the twenties. It’s just so damn funny.”
“I suppose it is a little melodramatic,” She giggled to herself.
“Just a little?” He looked at her with a raised eyebrow, and Joey collapsed into laughter as she realized herself the absolute drama of it all. Finally both of them recovered their serenity enough to talk.
“Jo, you kill me you really do.”
“So what happened with you and Audrey?” Joey asked.
“Ah Potter. What always happens, miscommunication followed very quickly by accusations then we traversed into stormy silences, managed to climb back to heady reunions then fell dramatically into cooling off periods.”
“And then what?”
“Well I was in LA with her, and I drove to San Diego to cool off for a couple of days. Her cooling off location was a little more up market, Maui with her parents.”
“So you just assumed it was over?”
“No, I know it is. The Dear Pacey letter I received from her when I got back to LA pretty much cemented it.”
“Oh,” Joey withheld the verbal barrage she had saved. It was obvious from his voice that Pacey truly had cared about Audrey and was remorseful that it ended badly.
“But honestly, it wasn’t destined to be long term. You can’t base a relationship on sex alone.” He sighed, more to himself than Joey.
“You can’t have one without it either,” Joey muttered.
“What?!” Pacey choked on his drink.
“Tell anyone what I am about to tell you Witter, and you’ll suffer unspeakable torture in a variety of forms and methods.”
“Taking it to the grave.”
“Well, it’s just that the relationship with Dawson and I, we spent some much time idolizing our own infatuation. This whole soul mates issue, destined to be together. I do believe that Dawson and I will always be linked inextricably but in the everyday practicality of it, it just doesn’t work. He is anal retentive and pensive and confining, I like my freedom. And in all honesty, he’s not that great in bed.”
“Excuse me?”
“You might as well know we slept together in LA but it was so awkward and juvenile. I felt like I was 15 years old back in his bedroom, with him fumbling for my bra strap and pawing at my chest. Not exactly igniting my deeper passions.”
“But I thought he slept with Jen?”
“Obviously not enough. I know that a relationship shouldn’t be based on sex alone, I fully understand that but at nineteen I am wanting to live my life here a little. I want fun and recklessness, I want to get drunk and go crazy. I do not want to settle down in Leery land of long walks and Sunday picnics,” Pacey chucked to himself.
“What, um, made you come to this realization?”
“You.”
“Me?” He was truly shocked.
“Yes, something you said to me this year. At the time I took it literally for that moment, but the more I thought about, the more I realized it applied to my entire life.”
“And what was it that I actually said?” 
“You told me to find the other Joey, the one who plays strip poker and drinks, the one who sails away on yacht for the summer. And I realized whenever I was the other Joey I was happy, my life made sense. So Dawson and I sat down had another verbal roundabout and here I am.”
“So for the next three weeks you want me to entertain other Joey?” Pacey asked slyly.
“You betcha ass, so we have the boat to sail away on, I see the beginning of drinks, and there must be a deck of cards on this boat somewhere!” She smiled, her eyes gleaming with mischief and Pacey immediately fell all over again.

“So I have beer, margarita mix, tequila and nuts. Anything else?” Jack lugged the last case on the deck.
“Add ear plugs because this one snores loud enough to wake the dead,” Pacey smiled pointing to Joey.
“Hey Joey, what are you doing back?” Jack ran over and scooped Joey into his arms.
“Long story, similar ending.” She smiled.
“Oh.” Jack stuttered unsure of how to react.
“I’m fine. Hey how was Costa Rica?” She enthused.
“Long story, nutshell version, never quite made it.” He shrugged obviously not that disappointed.
“So Jen went alone?” Joey quizzed.
“No Jen did not go alone, she amazingly spent most of her summer in the Hamptons with her parents.” Jen replied placing the bag of groceries in Pacey’s arms and hugging Joey.
“What?” Joey laughed.
“Long story. But as one can imagine my summer trip was more therapy than recreation.”
“But that’s okay because my friends we are about to depart onto the high seas of leisure and relaxation. With me as your guide into the world of aquatic wonder and magic.”
“God you talk a lot of crap Pacey,” Jen shrugged and marched back to the dock to bring aboard more supplies.
“Tell me about it. Now this time Pace I am going to have a change of clothes. So I am just going to run back to the dorm and grab some stuff. Won’t be long.” She smiled and darted off. He watched her run, her excitement clearly visible and he smiled to himself. She was finally getting to the point of realizing what made her happy and achieving it.
“Dude, what’s going on?” Jack nudged him conspiratorially.
“Nothing.” 
“Right.” Sarcasm rolling off his tongue. 

The maps strewn out before him, Pacey scratched his head with finality. He now had a course and was plotting his movements, readying to relay to Harbor Master when another voice interrupted his work.
“Got room for another stowaway?”
“Dawson? What the hell are you doing here?” Pacey asked in complete surprise.
“Well it’s good to see you too Pacey,” Dawson smiled and dropped his bag on the deck.
“Sorry man, it’s just I thought you were preparing to become Miramax’s next darling child.” 
“Hardly, running errands and occasionally commenting on the dailies was about the extent of it. But it’s finally gone to post production and I got three weeks off before film school starts.”
“Seems everyone has free time on their hands these days,” Pacey muttered to himself.
“Sorry?”
“Nothing. So how’d you know I was here?”
“Jen mentioned that you lucked into the jackpot of jobs for the summer. So I thought I’d come and offer my services as deck hand? Got any room?” Dawson asked pleadingly.
“I don’t know Dawson your history regarding boating hasn’t been that distinguished,” Pacey smiled uncomfortably, knowing there was no way he could flat out refuse Dawson. 
“Hey Dawson, you coming on the high seas?” Jack smiled as he wandered onto the deck.
“Just awaiting the final clearance from Captain Witter here?” Dawson placed the decision back to Pacey.
“Sure um make yourself at home. Jen’s around somewhere, and we set sail in about half an hour.” Pacey gestured around the deck and watched as Jack lead Dawson off in search of place to sleep. With no recovery time whatsoever Joey bounded up the stairs and threw her bag to Pacey.
“To my state room bell boy.” She joked, and for a moment all thought of triangles evaporated from his mind and he marveled at how beautiful she was. He had forgotten, not forgotten really, just become accustomed to it. But here in the streaming sunlight, her hair hanging loosely around her neck, her eyes sparking with excitement he began to appreciate it all over again.
“Hello Pacey? When are we leaving?” She clicked her fingers in front of his eyes.
“Um, in about half an hour. Jo, there’s something you should know…” But it was too late, just as Pacey had begun to approach the subject of the additional guest, Dawson and Jack rounded the corner. Silence befell the deck.
“Hey Dawson,” Joey was the first to recover.
“Hey Joey,” He replied, just as quickly.
“Back early from LA?” She breezed lightly.
“Finished the film early,” Dawson responded. Silence hit again.
“Well I gotta go check out with the Harbor Master and then we can get this journey underway.” Pacey rapidly interjected.
“I’ll come with you.” Joey jumped, a little too eagerly.

“What is he doing here?” Joey asked, tersely.
“Okay calm down Potter. Just breathe.” He grabbed her by the shoulders more as protection than restraint.
“I think Jen mentioned to him that I was setting sail. No, she didn’t invite him, he pretty much did that himself. No, I don’t think he knew you were here, so it’s not a deliberate attempt to sabotage your holiday. And no, you can’t spend the next three weeks in your dorm.”
“But…” She tried to finish but could only manage a sullen defeated glare.
“And Potter if you give me that look for the next three weeks I will throw you overboard and not look back. I want to see other Joey. That’s why you came, other Joey will have to meet Dawson eventually and it seems that this cruise will be her chance.”
“It’s just that whenever I am around him, Pace I am suddenly filled with unresolved issues of angst and melodramatics.” She smiled slowly.
“Well I will make it my personal mission to not let that occur onboard.” He guided her from the office where they had just planned their route with the correct marine authorities. 
“So what are we supposed to do just sit around as though nothing happened?” Jo continued.
“No, Miss. Potter. There will be no talk of past recriminations or errors in judgement. Positive people on board only.”
“Since when were you the optimistic dreamer?”
“Right about the time your bottom lip started sticking out?”
“Bite me Witter.”
“Tell me where to start Potter.” He smiled. They wandered casually back to the boat and found Jen, Jack and Dawson sitting on the sun deck next to the spa.
“So Captain my Captain are we ready to depart?” Jen asked, saluting Pacey in mock. 
“All plans have been filed and we are affirmed departure.” He saluted back. He headed to the bridge, where he began initializing the computer guidance systems and steering programs. When Pacey was asked through a friend of a friend that he knew in LA if he could sail a boat, he'd had no hesitation in saying yes. But standing behind the controls of this multi million dollar vessel, the hesitation slowly was creeping in. Yes, he had spent the past week solidly reading every manual the ship had, and learning backwards and forwards the interior workings of everything onboard. He was actually well qualified to be in charge, but the Witter self esteem kicked in, and for some reason, he felt fear. 
“You can do it.” The voice cut in. 
“Sorry?”
“I trust you Pace.” Joey smiled and slid a reassuring arm over his shoulder. Just briefly but long enough for his skin to tingle. She wandered away as quickly as she has entered, only three words needed to be said. Although the fear hadn’t disappeared, it had by no small means dissipated. He turned the key after what seemed an eternity spent staring at it, and the engine shuddered to life. The gentle hum filled the room, and he felt more in control, and as he went through every check list mentally and noticed that everything had been completed, he actually began to smile. Her statement kept ringing in the back of his mind, that she after all this time away trusted him completely, with her life. 

Straight and Narrow

“There’s really only one way to solve this situation.”
“What?” A desperate request.
“Get absolutely drunk out of our minds.” Jen smiled with sheer satisfaction.
“How is that going to solve anything?”
“Oh many ways Pacey. Firstly, the incredible tension that has taken residence on this boat for the past three or so hours will slowly evaporate. Secondly, everyone when they are drunk is reduced to telling their deepest darkest secrets and usually it’s about something they are feeling about someone they shouldn’t. And last but not least, that’s what we came here to do, party like we soap operatic teens never have. Joey’s right, we are far too melodramatic, we need to just cut loose, and not think repercussions.”
“There is a small problem with your ingenious plan? If we are to be so inebriated who will steer the boat?”
“No Pace that’s were the genius begins to reveal itself, because as we are all getting intoxicated, you can simply sit back and sip your beer while claiming safety. Have enough for some Dutch courage but not enough so we’d rear end an iceberg or something.”
“I can always drop anchor off shore.” He mumbled. 
“Exactly, that’s the spirit. So shall I cut the lemon into wedges?”
“Why not?” Sighed Pacey. He glanced out onto the deck where Joey was reading a book intensely ignoring Dawson who was attempting to add color to his pale skin. 
“Man is it cold out there?” Jack entered the bridge area, where Pacey and Jen had been talking.
“Not really.” Jen was momentarily confused.
“Sometimes I worry about you.” Jack laughed.
“Oh. Still not talking to each other?”
“No there was a small request to pass the sunscreen which was broken half an hour later to comment on the beautiful scenery otherwise it’s politely hostile.”
“But aren’t they supposed to be friends?” Jen asked.
“Nice theory, not so in practice.” Pacey lamented.
“So what’s happening in here?” Jack changed subject not without noting Pacey’s sour grimace. He had seen the way Pacey’s eyes had lit up the moment Joey had arrived, and he knew immediately the attraction for both of them had re-ignited.
“Tonight we are getting fall down spring break drunk.” Jen enthused.
“I am so glad we appointed you Cruise Director.”
“Was there another choice?” Jen and Jack headed back onto the deck.
“Pacey you coming?” Jen gestured already knowing the answer.
“Nah, I’ve got some charting to do, then I thought I might start I dinner.” 
“Oh, I forgot your cooking. This doesn’t really get any better does it?” Jen asked to no one in particular as she wandered off to try and reconnect Joey and Dawson to at least speaking terms before dinner. She could at least try.

“So what are we actually having?” Joey sat perched on the bench top as Pacey idly sliced some onions and threw them into the sauce with careful ease.
“In honor of our aquatic journey seafood linguini. Easy on the garlic.” Pacey reached over to the bottle of wine and refilled Joey’s glass before splashing some into the simmering sauce.
“Why didn’t you become the culinary king before we went away?” Joey smiled.
“Well then I would have been stuck in the kitchen all day, and you would have been required to catch the fish. Which therefore would have meant we wouldn’t have been eating regularly.”
“Excuse me, on many occasion I caught some very nice fish.”
“Jo we had to throw them back because they were too small remember?”
“I still caught them.” She bit back.
“Whatever helps you sleep.” He smiled, remembering how this dance was, the ease of it all. The sarcasm a precursor to the underlying attraction, and the fear he felt now all too familiar, the fear of rejection. Had too much time expired for her to recall those feelings? Could she ever feel that way about him again after the way he’d turned against her? Everyday he punished himself for their ending. Every word, incrimination and gesture of anger directed towards her made him want to be physically sick. How, after all that time apart could she possibly ever want to hold him the way she had?

“Okay. Okay, I have a great game we can play!” Jen, more than adequately on her way to be drunk boldly suggested. Dinner had been quietly successful, Jen and Jack both over compensating for the lack of conversation by talking excessively. Yet as the night was wearing on, the ice was beginning to melt. The fact that Joey was very positively drunk, and Dawson, Jack and Jen not far behind her meant nothing. The group had honestly been yearning for some reckless fun, wild abandon. Pacey sat back smiled he wasn’t drunk but enjoying the superiority of his soberness. However, what was making him smile wasn’t his ability to construct sentences. Joey had as the night worn on, begun to rest her hand on his knee. Casually and with no words spoken but the shivers he was receiving from her touch made him smile more than he had thought possible for this entire journey.
“Everyone, pipe down the Cruise Director would like to address us all.” Jack announced, and handed the imaginary microphone to Jen.
“Right ladies and gentlemen assemble yourselves and Tequila shots because we are going to play a little game. Anyone head of Never Have I Ever?” Jen winked.
“Nooo way!” Jack and Dawson chorused.
“I want to play!” Joey chimed in over the top, her drunken glee making Pacey laugh.
“How?” She asked.
“For the unsure, it’s very simple. We go around the table and say one thing starting like this. If it’s my turn; Never Have I Ever had sex. Now because that’s not true for myself and OTHERS here I must take a shot. Questions can be anything but much better when regarding the sexual variety.” Jen instructed with sweeping arm gestures. 
“So I will start because you are too chicken. Never Have I Ever had sex.” Jen smiled. Pacey, Dawson, Jack, Joey and Jen all shot.
“Boring Jen we all know we had sex.” Joey over pronounced. 
“My turn, Never Have I Ever had sex in a public place.” Joey questioned not bringing the glass to her lips. Everyone stared then at the same time Pacey and Jen both lifted their glasses.
“Woah not together. My was in New York days but Pacey?” Jen laughed.
“Tamara, the Ruins. Audrey, a park somewhere in Colorado, there were others to but I can’t remember.” Pacey blushed.
“Okay, fine then my turn Never Have I Ever had a sexual interaction with someone of the same sex, sorry Jack.” Pacey smiled. Jack obligatorily drunk, but when Jen raised her glass, a cry arose from the group.
“Once again New York heady days. I have lived a little.”
“Okay so that means me. Never Have I Ever 69’ed, male or female?” At that Jack drank at his own suggestion. Pacey and Jen guilty drank.
“Well look at these two go at it.” Joey giggled.
“Okay, Never Have I Ever slept with every girl in this room.” Dawson’s pride seeped through, obviously bitter about not drinking except for the give in sex question. He grandly slugged his drink back.
“Damn you Lindley, why could you not put out?” Pacey mumbled sarcastically. Joey was devilishly giggling to herself. 
“What’s so funny Potter?” Pacey whispered in her ear as the group disassembled to plunder another Tequila bottle. 
“I bet she wishes she did.” Joey laughed.
“What?”
“I bet she wishes she fucked you instead of Dawson.” Joey dramatically whispered the giggling never leaving her voice.
“Jo, you can’t say things like that here!”
“Opps!” She covered her mouth with her hand. 
“Okay, okay. New game-” Jen shouted.
“But we barely started that one.” Joey eagerly replied. Ignoring her Jen went on.
“Truth or Dare!” 
“YEAH!” Joey jumped up and Jack cheered.
“Well seeing as it was my turn anyway I will go first. Jack truth or dare?” Jen tittered.
“Truth baby!” He shouted, then had another Tequila shot.
“Oh okay out of Pacey or Dawson, who would you rather sleep with?” Jen laughed, Joey clapped. Dawson and Pacey blushed.
“Jen you are bitch. But I will answer as answer I must. Sorry Dawson, but the brunettes do it for me.” Dawson grumped Pacey shaded a deep red.
“Ah but it is my turn, Dawson truth or dare my friend?” Jack insisted. 
“Dare.” He jumped.
“I want you to suck on Jen’s nipple for thirty seconds.” Jack laughed uproariously as Jen’s face fell. Yet the alcohol consumption had been more than enough for Jen to grab her breast and offer it to Dawson. He woozily arose from his chair and knelt down beside her. He pressed his lips to her breast and began licking.
“30, 29, 28 …” Jack counted as Joey again laughed, Pacey laughing too both knowing why. While Dawson sucked away on Jen’s breast and Jack circled them counting, Joey slide her hand over Pacey’s groin area. He looked at her with surprise. She winked back but said nothing. Immediately he felt himself swell against his khaki cargo shorts, and thanked God they were all sitting down at table cover his lower torso.
“3, 2, 1 …” Jack finished and Dawson slowly drew away. 
“Okay my turn.” Dawson drunkenly sat back down. 
“Jen truth or dare?” Dawson laughed and drank some more Tequila.
“Why always me? Okay fine DARE!” She cheered.
“I wanted you to kiss Joey for 15 seconds. Tongue included.” Dawson cheered. 
“Yes!” Jack and Pacey both cheered. Joey looked a little shocked but her Dutch courage was more than present.
“What are you cheering about you’re gay?” Jen looked at Jack.
“Hey I was a fake heterosexual guy once, and beside who says a gay man can’t enjoy a bit of lesbian action?” He laughed. Joey moved into Pacey’s seat and hesitantly stared at Jen.
“Let’s just do it and get it over with, Pacey line us up a double Tequila each! Ready go.” Jen leaned in and kissed Joey, reluctantly at first and then as Jack’s counting faded away, her tongue gently massage Joey’s and equally back. She stroked her face and was happy for the refreshing change of no stubble. Joey relaxed every so slightly, the alcohol definitely numbing her sense, but holding Pacey’s hand under the table, he reassuring stroked her palm, making her feel safe. Even through the haze of drunkeness she knew she wanted him. Tequila was only making her horny.
“1! Nice effort.” Jack and Dawson high fived. At the same time both Joey and Jen drank their shooters.
“Okay, fine fine, my turn. Pacey truth or dare?” Jen drew the sentence out.
“Popular choice of the night, dare.” He smiled, somewhat seductively.
“Tequila body shot off Joey. Salt on her upper inner thigh, Tequila in her cleavage, lemon in her mouth!” Jen triumphantly directed. Jack cheered again, enjoying the ongoing sexual liberation of the Capesiders. Dawson said nothing, he wanted to protest and wrestle Pacey to the ground, jealousy of old rearing its head. But something inside him said no, somewhere deep within. As Joey gleefully lay down on the table and hitched her summer skirt higher than high Pacey leaned over.
“You sure you’re okay with this Jo?” He whispered in her ear.
“Just suck my thigh would you Witter?” She smiled back not without noticing his straining erection. Pacey licked his lips and dove in, languidly licking the salt off her inner thigh, forcing himself not to stay there when he felt her shiver under his touch. He moved to the shot glass lying atop her small cleavage. He drank quickly wanting to move to the final stage. Pressing his lips against hers with the searing Tequila forgotten he sucked the lemon wedge but also her lips, desperately wanting her to know what he was feeling. Slowly he drew away, and the sound of Jen and Jack cheering came back to him. Joey gradually sat up and back in her seat, smiling from ear to ear.
“Well after that I am so hot, who wants a spa DARE to all of you for skinny dipping?” Jen laughed and threw her top off to reveal her white lacy bra, and then dropped her skirt to expose a matching set of panties and skipped off to the spa. Everyone stared quietly at each other then Dawson and Jack both followed laughing together. Pacey beginning picking up the glasses and moving them to the kitchen as away to distract himself from what he wanted to be doing. 
“Don’t you want a spa Pace?” Joey sighed suggestively.
“Little crowded for my liking.” Pacey cleared his throat.
“But aren’t you hot?” Joey stood from the table, her finger between her teeth. Pacey stood in the kitchen his hands making fists and unclenching them again, desperate to remain in some control.
“You could say that I am.” He whispered.
“Me too.” Joey happily stated, and whipped off her own shirt. Pacey breathed heavily. 
“Jo you are really drunk right now and believe you me, I would love to help you with that temperature problem you are having but I don’t want to take advantage of you. I want us being together to mean something more…” Joey removed her skirt as Pacey trailed off.
“Pacey firstly, I haven’t had a good lay in really, really long time. Secondly, I am not so drunk that I won’t remember or regret doing this, I wanted you the second I stepped on that dock, not when the wine you kept pouring for me over dinner effected me. But to prove my willingness to you Mr. Witter I offer this, if I can walk in a straight line to you, you must do whatever I say?”
“Sounds fair enough to me.” Pacey was already grinning from ear to ear.
“Okay here goes.” Joey placed one foot in front of the other and wobbled. Focusing like never before in her life she straightened up. The next foot came around and the wobbling continued. Pacey watched on desperately, the seconds excruciatingly ticking by, his skin itching for her to touch him, his erection desperate to be inside her. Joey looked at Pacey and sighed, he seemed so far away, determinedly she put her head down and focused on the floor easing another foot around, swaying like a kite in gale force winds. Pacey marched across before she fell over and grabbed her.
“Straight enough for me.” He hoarsely whispered.

They slammed up against the wall with a desperate force, Pacey’s tongue probing her mouth with a new intensity. His thigh was riding between her legs and Joey breathed heavily, the passion almost overwhelming her. How she had forgotten it could be this good was beyond her. She looked deeply into Pacey’s eyes searching through the lust and male instincts and found love. She knew to him this wasn’t just a quick screw, it was more, and that turned her on even more. His hand searched her body, covering all the areas he hadn’t been allowed to touch for so long. Yet he teased her, running his fingers from upper thigh to upper thigh but never higher, through the middle of her cleavage but never left or right. Around her navel but never lower, she was dying for his touch to stray. The entire time she ran her fingers through his hair and around his face, but as way to show him she wanted, needed more she slipped her hand to his behind and squeezed. At this point Pacey burst out laughing.
“What?” Joey breathed heavily.
“I just forgot how demanding you are when you’re horny.” He smiled.
“Yeah and I forgot how much you like to tease me.”
“Should we be doing this?” He asked hoping against hope. A silent pause time holding still.
“Absolutely.” Both murmured before pouncing on each other. This time Pacey refused to tease her, two years had been more than enough. He slid his hands under her bra and caressed her breast with gentle desire. She moaned slightly as he tweaked her nipple between his fingers, his tongue playing delicately with hers, a back and forward battle for domination. His other arm circled her waist and hoisted her against the wall, and she willing wrapped her legs around him and felt his erection against her. He leaned back and looked at her, smiling to himself he carried her to the bench in the bathroom and placed her on the cool tile. She whimpered aloud but didn’t complain, it offered cool respite against the searing heat between her legs. He slowly ran his hands along the outside of her legs towards her panty line, where he linked his fingers with the material and gently slipped them off. Something was truly erotic about him being fully clothed and Joey almost entirely naked, and he smiled, removing his shirt, his skin needing to be against hers. She breathed heavily with the new sensation of his flesh and grabbed the nape of his neck to bring him into another searing kiss. He bit her bottom lip and then traced a pattern across her neck with his tongue. At the same moment his hand had gently traced down her stomach, across her navel and into her region, where she was already wet with anticipation. Joey opened her legs wider to accommodate his probing fingers, already the waves beginning to roll. He spread her apart and began circling her clit with a gentle massage. He felt her twitch beneath him and knew he was home.

“Tell me Jo.” He whispered in her ear, then traced her lobe with his tongue.

“Oh…right there…Pa…ce” She could barely construct the sentence. His fingers rolling in motion with her hips that had risen off the bench pushing into the sensation. He pressured his touch and increased the rhythm, Joey gasped.
“Oh my God.” She whispered hoarsely. He felt her coming, her wetness, her throbbing. Her fingers running violently through his hair. His finger tip caressed her clit faster and faster, lightly but enough to have Joey bucking his every movement.
“Keep going Pace, keep going.” She pleaded with him, his continued cock throbbing with his own anticipation the mere sight of Joey in this way enough to satisfy him.
“Oh Pacey, I’m coming, I’m coming.” And at that exact moment he moved his mouth to where his finger had been and began following their pattern with his tongue. He sucked her gently and she cried with excitement, his hands steadying her hips which were involutarily thrusting upward. His fingers flurrying across her clit giving her the external orgasm she always loved, his tongue signing his name across her lower lips.
“Oh God!!” Joey shouted emphatically as she shuddered above Pacey, her legs twitching, her hips vibrating, her entire body shaking as she arrived at the pericipce and fell with a thunderous arrival. Pacey smiled Joey had never been that vocal with him before, and this was only Act One. Her hair damp from her sweat, hung in her eyes but she still gazed at him with a desire than caused him to shudder. She slowly sat up and wrapped her legs around Pacey drawing him into her embrace. Her body raked with heavy breathing, the silence broken by her continued search for air.
“I forgot how good you were at this.” She whispered into his ear, her hand gently stroking his behind.
“It’s um…something you pick up.” He cleared his throat, her hands roaming distracting him. 
“Pace I want you to know right now that I love you.” She looked deep into his eyes, wanting him to understand that she really meant it.
“Sure Jo, you love everyone when your drunk.” He attempted to laugh it off, so fearful that’s all it was to her.
“Pacey. Look at me, this is not about my alcoholic efforts tonight. I want you, not just because of what just happened. I want you for what’s inside. I love you.” 
“Really?” He was barely audible, his eyes not daring to look at her.
“Really.” She made him look at her. 
“Really.” She repeated. He kissed her, with a tenderness that replaced the passion and urgency from earlier. A tenderness that meant he knew she would be there tomorrow.
“Now please don’t let my next action cancel that statement or my utter satisfaction from what just happened.” She smiled.
“You feeling sick?” He looked at her pale demeanour.
“Oh yeah.” She smiled then dashed to the toilet bowl where she threw up. Pacey laughed gently to himself then turned around placed a hand on her back and gently rubbed as she hung her head low. He searched the floor for her underwear, found them and gently eased her legs into them. He found his shirt and wrapped her up in it. Joey thew up just one more time and then tilted her head back.
“Oh Pacey I am mess.” She whimpered.
“Yes Miss. Potter you are but I still love you.” He poured a glass of water from the tap and rested it against her head.
“Really Pacey? Even like this?” She looked at him through heavy eyes and sipped gently before rinsing her mouth out.
“Even like this Potter.” He smiled.
“Are you done?” He asked gently.
“Yes.”
“You want a shower?” He offered.
“Oh yes please.” She wanted nothing more. He hoisted her into his arms and carried her gently through the boat to the master bedroom and bathroom.

Questions & Comments

After he helped her shower and gently lowered her into his bed, Pacey watched her sleep. God he had fallen in love with her watching her sleep and now the memories came flooding back. How special he felt to be loved by her, to know her touch and have her smile in reaction to him. He had forgotten the inner warmth that came with loving Joey Potter, not forgotten just pushed aside. Their time apart was necessary, they both needed to grow. He had known that, as did she but how hard it had been to walk away. After he destroyed her publicly with his sheer stupidity and then reaffirmed with his talk to her afterwards. How Joey Potter could even look at him with an ounce of desire baffled him. Even after their second parting where they held each other for the final night both knowing that it was the end, both crying silent tears he still felt ultimately responsible and ultimately guilty. Pulling the cover over her, he stepped out of the room. Standing in the hallway for a moment he caught his breath, unbelievably this wasn’t a dream and more than Joey being here, and wanting him. Dawson Leery hadn’t even entered into the equation, except to provide the answer. There was no triangle, and in some way Pacey believed Dawson knew that, he had been given a chance to make Joey happy, no third party or geographic interruptions could be blamed on this parting. It had been her decision to sever the ties with the boy across the creek. Running his hands through his hair with emotional exhaustion Pacey chuckled to himself. So much for a slow solo cruise to recollect his thoughts. He wandered through kitchen, glasses haphazardly lying in the sink. On the deck a cool breeze was blowing but the weather was calm and Pacey let out sigh. Startled he heard a yelp from the spa, and realized that Jen, Dawson and Jack were still raging on. He had lost track off time but obviously Joey and he had been conspicuously absent because when he walked into sight, all three oohed and aahed and Jack gave a long wolf whistle. 
“Where have you been Mr. Witter?” Jen asked giggling.
“No where.” Pacey smiled, his eyes glancing at Dawson who said nothing. 
“Sure. You were getting into the Potter panties!” Jack shouted drunkenly. At this Pacey frowned.
“Sorry dude. But you did, didn’t you?” Jack lowered his voice.
“Hey Pacey I think it’s great, congratulations I say.” Dawson saluted, and then proceeded to step out of the spa and shake Pacey’s hand vigorously. Pacey shielded his eyes.
“Okay thanks Mr. Leery, but little Dawson didn’t need to be seen.” Pacey laughed, somewhat relieved but also somewhat disgusted. Poor Joey he thought viciously to himself. All three in the spa laughed uproariously and group hugged splashing water wildly. Pacey walked away shaking his head, the reckless fun was obviously continuing on for some time and there was only one place he wanted to be.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Dear Online Dating DoucheBag

I wasn't planning to discuss my love life - really, because there isn't much to discuss - but just because this was supposed to be a less introspective blog. Still, after just experiencing a very strange/normal encounter, I can only repeat it for sheer 'I told you myself-ness.'

Where is this key?
I'm an internet dater, not ashamed to admit. Combination of not hitting the bars so much and also living my work both professionally and coming home to write more. Anyway, I've recently been emailing Douchebag as he is now known. Perfectly okay guy but a few instincts flared - firstly, claiming a job that seemed a bit unrealistic, and then ick factor of immediately launching into phrases such as 'Hey Cutie' ... 'Hi Sexy' without a real invitation to. After a few conversations with this littered all over the convo, I thought, I'm calling him on it - witness the below transcript your Honour.

First the message left for me after we'd missed each other chatting:

DB said Hey spunky.....Im on ever night....but only for you xxxx

The transcript of tonight's convo:

DB said So, what else you been up to? - I was looking at your pics, and didnt realise you were soo cute...
You said Charmer...also slightly skeezy? I don't mean to offend, just seems to be coming on a little strong? If you're looking for just a hookup, no harm, no foul - that's just isn't me. [Sorry for offloading - I'm in a very direct mood tonight]
DB said Well thats cool....not looking to sound skeezy.....
You said Sorry, it's just I've run into a few dodgy guys on here, so I'm a tad sceptical about it and with no tone, I'm probably reading them far differently than you intend
DB said yes, perhaps you are
 
And then he disconnected the chat and basically hauled ass away from me!?
 
My immediate reaction was of course - knew it! Do you think I was too direct?