Dear The Moment for Buffy

There is always a moment. A moment when you go from being a casual fan, to a fully immersed fanatic. It could be a book, a movie, a TV show - anything really. It's that moment, that your brain clicks and you become really connected to the characters, you become big time invested in what they do, how they're treated and how they let themselves be treated.

Buffy is for me, still one of my very most favourite shows - ever! I can actually proudly say I was a fan before it was really cool to like Buffy. I would stay up at late to watch episodes shown months after the US had seen them. And there was a moment that turned me. The moment that made me write fan-fiction, the moment that made me learn to write basic HTML (yep, I was an undercover tech nerd girl) and create a Buffy fan site (The Stacks and hosted by Geocities - God I'm old).

That moment:



It's just heartbreaking. The crack in her voice, the honest despair at facing death when most people her age are full of life, the desperation of being locked into her fate.

This is That Moment that turned me into an uber Buffy because I loved the idea of a hero so vulnerable, a hero who despite getting to rock Whedon gems every week, was still a sixteen year old high school student who didn't want to die. It is something I still carry with me today (especially in my writing!).

I'll explore more Moments with other fandoms I'm invested in but I want to ask, what was your moment? For any fandom?

Dear TV Crushes of Today

Jim Halpert, (John Krasinski) The Office

Admittedly, I'm far more partial to John Krasinski, the actor who plays Jim, but it was Jim that wooed me in. Jim, of the pining, longing love for Pam, his co-worker in the US version of The Office. Before you all tell me how much superior the UK version is blah, blah, I say this. I say it's a different show - yes the horrible redux of Season One in which they basically repeated the UK episodes verbatim is bad, but Season Two becomes something else and the show takes off!

Central to it all is the heart of The Office and that's thanks to Jim and Pam. Best friends and cohorts who denied their feelings for a LONG time, John Krasinski's mastered the loving from afar look and the unspoken heartbreak to the camera shot - in fact, his performance in the Season Two finale episode Casino Night, in which he professes his love and is awkwardly rejected is heartbreaking - I cried!

But beyond The Office, John is all the best bits of Jim. Adorkably cute, funny and able to give some of the most charming TV chat show interviews (I defy you to watch any of his Ellen or Jimmy Kimmel interviews and not smile). And he got the hot girl - marrying Emily Blunt last year, they both appear settled and normal and I want to be adopted by them (sorry Mum and Dad) so we can hang out together and play practical jokes on Jimmy Kimmel and visit George Clooney at Lake Como as they are want to do. 

Rick Castle/Capt. Malcolm Reynolds (Nathan Fillion), Castle/Firefly

Again following a trend, I'm partial to anything Nathan Fillion does but especially his Firefly work. As a Joss Whedon fanatic, I was shocked to see I'd missed this series when it first began but after weirdly seeing an episode and adoring it without knowing who was behind it, I was entranced. And of course, a big part of my adoration was Capt Malcolm Reynolds. Sarcastic, surly, closed off yet fiercely loyal, deeply protective and underneath, a man's man who would stand his ground in any battle he believed in.

After Firefly was cancelled (don't even get me started!) and the followup film Serenity screened, I kept following Mr Fillion. From his charming cheating doctor in Waitress to remembering I'd love him way back when as firefighter Johnny in Two Guys, A Girl and A Pizza Place (yep, the same one with Ryan Reynolds).

Then came Castle, a crime procedural for sure, but it made perfect use of Fillion's off-screen persona. His character is part charm, part playboy, part ego-driven man-child but he plays it with such fun and fearlessness that each Sunday night (despite my better intentions), I'm watching the latest episode. They have just ended Season Three in the US on a doozy of a cliffhanger and Nathan got to bring some of his hang dog puppy love looks to his female partner and for a TV show with a unresolved chemistry heavy plot, they just had a really frank discussion about their non-couple status - it was AWESOME and I squealed like every fan girl should.

Coach Taylor, (Kyle Chandler), Friday Night Lights

It was so close between Riggins and Coach Taylor but if we're talking about TV character crushes then Coach Taylor edged out Tim (sorry!). As an introduction to Coach Taylor, Kyle Chandler for those not familiar stole the show in the mega-Grey's Anatomy episode Code Black as the bomb squad captain who asked Meredith to picture someone else when removing the bomb. He was awesome and then he was blown up - silly Grey's!

If we're talking salt of the earth, simple man, with simple dreams and a sexy as hell southern drawl then we of course, can only be talking about Coach Taylor. Aside from being the central focus of this AMAZING television series, Coach Taylor was the moral compass for the show. He'd stray sometimes in the wrong direction but when he was focused and on it, so was the show. His speeches to the team, be they in a locker room, on the field or at his front door when they showed up for counsel at all hours were the best combination of poetry and manhood.

He was also part of the best portrayal of marriage on screen. It was real and honest and the Taylors fought over much but always were safe in the knowledge that they loved each other, they wanted each other and despite struggling with their own desires wanted the best for each other.

The last episode of the series had me weeping because yes, it was over but I was going to have to say goodbye to these characters - especially the Taylors. Coach Taylor, with his sunglasses, a protective barrier to the world. Coach Taylor with his hilarious and tender father/son relationship with Saracen. Coach Taylor with his odd couple friendship with Buddy Garrity. Coach Taylor: full eyes, clear hearts, can't lose.


Runners Up in the Now Crush Bracket:
Ianto Jones (Gareth David-Lloyd), Torchwood
Eric Northman, (Alexander Skarsgård), True Blood
Marshall Eriksen, (Jason Segel), How I Met Your Mother

Dear TV Crushes from the early to mid 2000's

Joshua Lyman (Bradley Whitford), The West Wing

As I got older, so did my men and so did their problems. Welcome to the complicated, hilarious, determined, arrogant, egotistical, vulnerable world of one Joshua Lyman. A man whose swagger both literal and metaphoric created a legion of female fans. If men were to have a 'smart' sex symbol in the 90's with Dana Scully, the ladies got their own back in the mid-2000's with Josh Lyman.

Thanks to the amazing words from Aaron Sorkin and the Peter Pan infused performance from Bradley Whitford, Josh was everything I desired - wait, still desire. He was wounded and brooding on occasion, whipfast smart always and that perfect balance of ego driven brilliance (as opposed to being ego driven jackass) and vulnerable man with wounded soul. Often described by his peers as the best among them (just never to his face), he only ever wanted to be the 'guy' that other could depend on and at times worked himself to extremes to achieve this goal.

Then of course, there was his Girl Friday inspired romance with his assistant Donna Moss. It was seven years of banter fuelled fun and misinterpretations and while it killed me as a fan, it never became old or Ross and Rachel-esque. At the conclusion of this amazing show, the interview Bradley Whitford and Janel Maloney did with Backstage magazine, basically summed up their relationship.

"In our relationship, I was always the hotshot Washington kid who needed a lot of ego to function, and people assumed I was in charge--when the truth was I couldn't have done anything without her."
-- Bradley Whitford

"I decided early on that this was a passionate, deep love relationship where my character was mad, head over heels in love."
-- Janel Moloney

He was also sporting possibly the sexiest white man backside in TV at the time. And ladies who know, will support me that when he rolled up his sleeves to get to work, those forearms - WOWSER! And those dimples to this very day, still kill me.



Logan Echolls (Jason Dohring), Veronica Mars

From one damaged man to another! Logan was more snark, more sarcasm and more deep vulnerabilities thanks to a completely messed up family. But boy did he love our legendary Veronica, who challenged his masochistic tendencies and loved him inspite and maybe because of his failings.

From the wealthy side of Neptune, with an abusive alcoholic, sleeping with your girlfriend murdering father and a missing presumed dead mother, he was bound to be messed up. But with Veronica, he was slightly calmed without ever being a converted puppy dog. He was always acting first thinking later, from his blind early hatred of Veronica based on misunderstandings, to carrying a gun to protect her from thugs who meant harm. Of course, he had an acid tongue which could be both hilarious and harsh and cause humour and heartbreak and when he wasn't being the best badass boyfriend around, he could be plotting your downfall just as easily.

The first two seasons of Veronica Mars, were chock full of the epic romance of LoVe (Logan and Veronica's portmanteau) from secret romances, to surprise party discoveries to make out session in girls bathrooms to violent (for the Mars lounge lamps only) breakups and then anti-prom declarations. And you know what, Wikipedia agrees with me, Logan Echolls is referenced in both Breakout Character status and Supercouple - that's a gold stamp of TV Crush approval right there.

A Teaser Trailer for a Book Not Published

Just a little something to promote my yet to be published, yet to be signed book. Really, my cart is definitely before my horse, my egg before my chicken, my season finale before my premiere - you get the picture. But I love creating trailers and to actually do it for my own stuff was both horrifically scary and easy at the same time.

The Proclaimed Teaser from FlossAus on Vimeo.

Dear TV Crushes from mid to late 90's

Noel Crane (Scott Foley),  Felicity

Noel, my blessed! He was the sweeter, less moody and less whispery part of the triangle of Felicity and Ben. Before you claimed Edward or Jacob (or didn't), you were either ardently for Noel or lusting for Ben - there was no middle ground. Felicity was constantly flipping between the two fellas and while we shared the same name and hairstyle (until she went crazy and cut her hair, and that cut the ratings!) but we never shared a hesitation over sweet, put it out there and tell the girl he loves her Noel (*cough* indecisive Ben *cough*).

Noel was Felicity's RA in her New York college dorm, and from the suburbs of Australia it all sounded so COOL and of course, it made me want to go to New York and hang out at Dean and Deluca. For extra bonus points Scott Foley married Jennifer Garner, before she was actually Jennifer Garner - take that Ben Affleck.

Angel (David Boreanaz ), Buffy The Vampire Slayer

If you wanted wounded and brooding, if you wanted tortured and lost then in the late 90's you looked no further than Angel. A vampire with a soul, who falls in love with the Slayer, this all happened at a time when vampires weren't cool and Buffy aired sporadically at best in Australia, on Seven at 11.30pm at night. Didn't stop me sitting captivated in front of my television for the epic Season Two of Buffy, when people turned evil and hearts were broken. As the series progressed so did David's acting skills (although his Irish accent has always been horribly shaky) and the starcrossed lovers continually played out the on and off relationship, leaving Buffy/Angel shippers with plenty of fan-fiction to write. David still has a soft spot in my heart and I'll admit to watching a bit of Bones to see him in action, if only because you see him smiling more than Angel ever got to do.

Pacey Witter (Joshua Jackson), Dawson's Creek

PACEY! The ultimate Floss crush, I LOVED (correction love) Pacey, like stalker love him. He was the sassy best friend to earnest and twee Dawson, who got to bed his teacher in season one and not have it appear weird. He got the mentally unstable Andie as his romantic interest in season two, but it also became his year to shine, a sarcastic anti-hero compared to Dawson and his whiny, self-involved crap. Season Three saw Pacey swoop in and create the magic triangle in which both Dawson and Pacey competed for her heart. Clearly the writers could see the chemistry between Josh and Katie that was heads above the weird brother/sister dynamic of Katie and James Van Der Beek.

What sent the fan girls wild for Pacey was his underdog, underachiever yet wanting so much more status. He was guys guy, playing practical jokes and organising parties with a mischievous grin. He was the supportive friend to all, standing up for gay Jack to a homophobic teacher, collecting girls from all parts of fictional New England while they dated idiots. He was the heart on his sleeve boyfriend who fell hard - he remembered everything she said, he kissed her first, he wrote on FREAKING WALL asking Joey to stay! The rest of Dawson's Creek was spent trying to keep Joey and Pacey apart which was crazy because why would you ever want to go elsewhere?

As a side note: Joshua Jackson has since become a fully fledged adult hottie. He's charmingly in love with Diane Kruger, openly admits that she, the fashion queen she is, dresses him. He's on a cult cool show, and he hasn't forgotten his awesome teen soap days - having a Pacey-Con outside at Comic-Con and reading fan-fiction and playing 'I Don't Wanna Wait' loudly. He's just AWESOME all over.

Runners Up in the Mid-to-Late 90's Crush bracket:
Bailey Salinger (Scott Wolf), Party of Five.
Max Evans (Jason Behr), Roswell
Newt Call (Scott Bairstow), Lonesome Dove: Outlaw Years.

Dear TV Crushes from Late 80's/Early 90's

Jonathan Brandis, Seaquest DSV

Awwh, what a cutie right? He was my first ever TV crush, so innocent and sweet and with really, really pretty hair. The show Seaquest DSV, was my first foray into futuristic worlds and of course, I loved it and it was probably a sign of things to come. The character of Lucas wasn’t all that special; he was the token kid of the craft and didn’t really have any romantic storylines – thank goodness because I probably would have cut the girl!

Sad footnote, childhood superstardom took its toll on Jonathan and he passed away in 2003. RIP

Dexter Fletcher, Press Gang

SPIKE! And don’t judge the jacket kids, because he was part of the super couple of Spike and Linda (thankfully in a time before couple hybrid names became the norm: imagine the horror of shipping Spinda?!). This couple was fiery, banter filled awesome, with Linda the control freak Editor and Spike the wise cracking reporter who rocked Ray Bans before everyone else. Linda and I also shared the same hairdo so I thought it was only a hop, step and skip to my very own Spike.

They shared some of the best back and forth dialogue, with my most favourite episode being the reunion of the super couple, after he secretly returned from America to the UK – sparks really fly from minute two: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBihA7_fSPA&feature=related

 It was hot, they were hot, and I shipped them BAD!

Sully, Dr Quinn Medicine Woman

Do I even need to explain? I’m mean come on, he’s got flowing locks, he’s on a horse, and carrying a wounded soul and a weapon! Sully was the non-Native American, Native American who supported Dr Michaela in convincing the Western town to support her in her efforts to be a Doctor. He was also sporting the mega burden of having his wife die tragically in child birth and spent many an episode looking soulful and sad. He was quiet and softly spoken, yet manly and could defend Dr. Mike’s honour like a badass. The chemistry was so smouldering that Jane Seymour tapped Joe Lando for a few seasons off screen as well as on screen.

Dean Cain, Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman

Now Dean Cain is a sad sidenote to Teri Hatcher but back then he was SUPERsexy. He made the cover of my science folder and lord knows, I never did any work. The character of Clark Kent was very vanilla and actually it was the will they, won’t they aspect that was hot and the show suffered terribly once they joined them together but still, Dean was at the time, a super buff leading man, who often looked broodingly at Lois and as you’ll come to realise, I can’t resist a brooder!

Part Two of My TV Crushes is when I become a WB poster child, worshipping Angel, Noel (forget Ben) and the almighty transcendent Pacey Witter.