Title: Glimpses of Everything and Nothing - Part 4/7
Author: Finn AUS
Rating: PG-13 (suggestive comments)
Spoiler Info: Vaguely placed somewhere in Season Seven NO SPOILERS FOR THE COLD
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: After a Republican makes suggestions about Donna and Josh's relationship in an attempt to derail the campaign, it forces them both to face the real truth.
Author Note 1: Firstly again, cause she's just the best, Caz for helping the suggestive be really suggestive!
A/N 2: A massive thanks to all those who sent feedback, and huge apologies for dragging it out, I promise to write faster (blame my boss - actually don't - she'll tell me to get back to work). For all those holding out for action, hang in there, seriously, it's coming.
Feedback: Love it, crave it, need it, beg it - it's my drug of choice
Donna eased away from her parking space, unable to erase the smile from her face. She’d managed to be quite restrained in front of Lou and the Congressman, delivering the proposed statements and agreeing to meet the next morning to map out a more comprehensive strategy. She’d bitten her lip once or twice on the elevator ride with other staffers to hide the smirk, and waved goodbye with a suitable amount of weariness. However, once in the safety of her car, she broke out into a cheek aching, heart soaring smile.
Donna had been floored tonight in so many ways. Firstly by the snotty congressman alleging on a late night political show that her relationship with Josh was unprofessional and that her qualifications were lacking. She’d flushed with embarrassment when reading the transcript, but then her anger had swelled and propelled her into action. Showing the transcript to Lou, Donna avoided her boss’s gaze when she suggested not including it in Josh’s daily press pack. Lou had agreed with her, but unfortunately, he had overheard a volunteer in the press office discussing the interview and had demanded to see a transcript.
Reluctantly Donna had handed over her well thumbed copy and watched nervously as his eyes grew wider the more he read. Without saying a word, Josh had spun around, grabbed his jacket and raced from the office, a murderous expression on his face.
Donna had called after him repeatedly but he was gone before either she or Lou could stop him. The next hour was spent planning a defence but inwardly she’d spent every second wondering where Josh was and what he was doing. She was pretty sure he’d gone to Vinnick’s offices but what the result would be, she had no idea. Her breath caught in her throat when he returned, and she’d cursed herself – both for noticing how distressed he’d seemed and then for wanting to do something, anything to help make it better. Her natural inclination, it seemed, was still to be ‘Donna the Assistant’; always… next challenge. But she quickly snapped herself out of it, reminding herself that that wasn’t her job any more.
Then came the indignity of having the campaign staff calmly discuss how best to deal with the fact that ‘half of Washington’ believed they were sleeping together! And if that hadn’t been bad enough, knowing that the Congressman had heard and then contributed to the discussion was Donna’s worst professional nightmare come true! But she held it all together and she was proud of her performance in that boardroom just now. In the past, she would have most likely flushed a deep shade of crimson and fled the room in an embarrassment. But that wasn’t who she was anymore – she’d held her ground, defended her position; and at one point in her argument she could have sworn she’d seen pride on Josh’s face as he’d grinned at her – something he hadn’t done in a long while. The warm feeling that spread through her at that, together with her own pride in how she had handled the situation had buoyed her up, made her feel good about herself in a way she’d not felt for quite some time.
But it was the conversation which had followed that was still baffling Donna. Josh had felt the same way? In her mind, she replayed him telling her that he might not have been able to resist her and she felt an irrepressible grin spreading across her face. Unbelievably all this time, he had wanted her as much as she’d wanted him, perhaps even more, if that were possible, and she couldn’t help but feel elated.
But despite that there was a part of her that was angry that he hadn’t allowed her to have any say in the matter and had made the decision on his own. That was typical Josh, though – he was the most single minded man Donna knew. He got an idea into his head and there was no stopping him, which of course, had landed him in plenty of trouble in the past. He might be able to walk into a room full of angry Congressmen and be five steps ahead of all of them… he may have the cutest butt in professional politics and dimples to die for – but put him in front of a woman he liked and he was at a loss. Donna shook her head gently, thinking of the times she’d encouraged him to date other women – she was almost as much of an idiot as he was, it seemed.
Donna yawned, realising she was almost home. Although driving through the empty streets had its advantages, she still would have preferred a bit of traffic to arriving home after 2.30am. Sitting patiently at a red light, she realised there was something nagging at the back of mind; something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. As the light finally changed, a sense of dread was sneaking slowly through her, an empty feeling settling in the pit of her stomach. When the actual thought finally surfaced, it hit her like a slap and almost winded her.
Josh had said he had loved her – not that he did love her. The entire conversation replayed in her head at warp speed and she realised that not once had either of them spoken in the present tense! Inhaling sharply, Donna’s smile evaporated. Whilst she and Josh had certainly begun to mend their friendship tonight, they’d not discussed their… feelings for one another beyond saying that they’d loved each other - once. Nothing had been said regarding any progression on that front and she realised with dismay that she was almost back at the beginning. Almost – because now, although she was in exactly the same place, it seemed to her as though Josh may have moved on. The thoughts swam in her head, her fatigue not helping to clear this new and depressing fog.
Arriving at her building, Donna was thankful to see that there was a parking space nearby, because between the exhaustion and disappointment she was now feeling, she didn’t know how far her legs were going to be able to carry her.
After managing to haul herself up the flight of stairs and into her apartment, she flopped onto the sofa for a moment and stared into space. She couldn’t actually believe it, the night had been so full of revelations and now…now she was left with the same aching pain that had become so familiar over the years.
Donna felt like curling up on the couch and crying - another familiar impulse from those times when things had become too much for her. She hadn’t done it often – she’d not allowed herself to do that, but there had been times – maybe Josh had had a really bad day and had taken some of it out on her, or perhaps the opposite – he’d been particularly nice to her, and she’d felt so ridiculously pleased about it that she’d berated herself for being so infatuated with him. But no – not now. She wasn’t going to cry over him again. If he could move on, so could she. Instead, she straightened up, blinked her eyes and attempted to focus on the first thing she had to do - sleep. Sleep would be her refuge for tonight and tomorrow she would find another. She’d being doing it for nine years, she could do it again.
She looked down at her cell phone charging in its cradle and noticed there were five new messages. Press calls asking for a comment, she assumed. The exhausted side of her brain begged her not to check them but the inquisitive side always won that battle and she dialled her voicemail.
‘Donna, Tom Hartman for the Miami Herald, wanting a quote on the allegations made tonight by Congressman-’ She pressed five firmly, saving that message for the morning. Another two calls were from journalists already hunting for a statement from Congressman Santos about her and Josh and like the first, they were saved for the morning. The next message came as somewhat of a surprise.
‘Donna, it’s CJ. Margaret just passed along the transcript and I’m so sorry. Give me a call anytime if there’s anything I can do to help. The President will most likely get this in the morning but we’re probably just going to refer back to you. You know I’d love for him to go on record, but it’s not his business and the press know that. Don’t forget, if you need to, call me.’
Donna sighed, happy to receive the call from CJ but realising that somewhere down the line, the President was going to have a conversation with someone about the status of ‘Donna and Josh’, and Donna was mortified. The final message was another pleasant surprise.
‘Donna? It’s Sam. I’ve just seen the interview, and I’m appalled. I wanted to let you know that I’m definitely thinking of you, and you’ve got plenty of legal options against this guy. Please call me and we can talk; remember we’re all proud of you and how far you’ve come – especially Josh,’ Donna smiled.
The shrill ring of her cell interrupted and despite her plummeting spirits she smiled again when she saw the name on the caller ID.
‘Hi,’ she answered brightly, reminding herself, moving on, I’m moving on.
‘Hey, how ya doing?’ She wondered why Josh would be calling her now when they’d only parted half an hour earlier.
‘Not bad, you okay?’
‘I… yeah, I’m … look…’
‘What do you need, Josh?’ Donna knew she was being short with him but she couldn’t help it.
‘Well, there is something.’ Despite her fatigue she could hear the nervousness underneath the bravado.
‘And that is?’ She was tired and her abruptness prompted a tense silence – she realised she was drumming her fingers impatiently on the table as she waited for him to answer.
‘I was… thinking… well, wondering actually - whether you think we should re-word the thing?’
‘Why?’ Donna knew she was whining – something else she’d learned from him, she thought irritably.
‘Well, it struck me that in our recent conversation both of us admitted to … having had feelings of a certain nature for the other.’ Donna walked aimlessly around her lounge room, the fact that he was speaking in the past tense not escaping her.
‘And?’
‘Well…I, um…you said you’d ‘spent’ nine years being in love with me,’ as Josh’s tone changed from good-humored to a husky whisper, Donna’s mind raced ahead, wondering if he’d come to the same conclusions she had and was going to use them as an escape route. They were both silent for a moment, Donna steadfastly refusing to help him break her heart again, wordlessly demanding that he have the courage to finish it himself, ‘I…I just wanted you to know that it’s not past tense for me.’ Donna stopped in her tracks, jolted into stillness.
‘Wha…’ she couldn’t finish the sentence.
‘Are you okay?’ Josh sounded panicked. ‘Listen, I’m sorry it’s not-’
‘Josh,’ she broke back in, ‘it’s fine, I just …wasn’t expecting that.’
‘Right,’ he sound dejected.
‘No, not like that!’
‘It’s fine, look I’ve got to go-’ he said, rapidly trying to end the conversation.
‘Josh!’ Donna urged, ‘it’s not past tense for me either.’ She smiled to herself hesitantly.
It was his turn to be shocked into silence. After a moment, she heard him release a breath. ‘Really?’
‘Really,’ she affirmed.
‘Kay.’ Donna would bet her life savings that he had a huge smirk plastered across his face right now. She could picture him, sleeves rolled up to the elbows, hair going in all directions, completely unable to keep still – and at that moment she wanted nothing more than to be there with him. Realising that she really ought to say something, Donna shook her head gently, pulling herself out of her trance.
‘The thing?’ she queried.
‘Yeah…’
‘You’re right - I think we’re going to have to change it.’ As she agreed with him, she was sure she could hear a smirk at the other end of the line.
‘That’s not all we’re going to have to change,’ he said suggestively, and oh God, she was wide awake now because that tone of voice had just sent what felt like a bolt of lightning through her.
‘Joshua…’ she warned, but she couldn’t help dropping her voice to what she hoped was a sexy level – she had always been able to match Josh in the flirting department – and was gratified to hear his voice catch as he spoke.
‘You could always change into that old school uniform,’ he drawled and she had to sit down, right now. Flopping down onto the sofa, Donna kicked off her shoes and swung her legs up under her. Now she was focused and it was game on.
‘Oh, you’re going to have to work a little harder for that my friend!’
‘Would I need to work? Have to work?’
Donna grinned unable to believe the turn the conversation had taken. Earlier she’d been ready to cry herself to sleep and here she was, going toe to toe in the flirting stakes with Josh Lyman.
‘Well, I do have certain standards, Josh… but I’m sure you’ll be able to come up with something,’ she whispered. A strangled groan came down the line followed by a moment’s silence - then Josh burst out laughing. Donna could barely remember the last time she’d heard him laugh and it made her incredibly happy to hear it again.
‘You crack me up,’ he chuckled warmly and Donna again wished she could see his smile.
‘Well, somebody told me once that my sense of humour was like a high wire act.’ He snorted.
‘Kay,’ she could tell he was scrubbing his hand across his face. ‘You need to get some sleep. Don’t forget to call Lou in the morning.’
‘Why?’
‘To tell her to hold off on putting out that statement until we’ve been able to make some changes. We can’t really issue a flat-out denial that there’s anything between us now, can we?’
‘Why? That’s what they’re trawling for. A denial might help kill it.’
‘Yeah, but I’m re-evaluating my denial.’ The playful tone was back.
‘Josh, as much as I’d like to go with that, professionally it’s not going to cut it,’ Donna sighed.
‘Know what? I don’t care. I’m not suggesting we take out an ad in the Post, but I’m not giving you up. ‘Kay?'
‘Joooosh,’ she attempted to scold him.
‘Donnatella,’ he said mischievously, ‘after everything we said tonight, I’m thinking an ‘entanglement’ isn’t such a bad idea.’
‘Really?’ She arched an eyebrow.
‘Really.’
‘OK.’
Continue on to Part 5
Saturday, April 9, 2011
West Wing Fan Fiction: Glimpses of Everything and Nothing 3/7
Title: Glimpses of Everything and Nothing - Part 3/7
Author: Finn AUS
Rating: PG-13 (swearing) - turns a little saucy in future parts so be warned!
Spoiler Info: Vaguely placed somewhere in Season Seven
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: After a Republican makes suggestions about Donna and Josh's relationship in an attempt to derail the campaign, it forces them both to face the real truth.
Author Note: A gold medal in the luge (cause that looks really hard and scary and so is my writing and grammar) to Caz, the beta of all beta's!
Feedback: Love it, crave it, need it, beg it!
Neither one could speak for fear of where this could go - fear of how far it had already gone. For a full five minutes both Donna and Josh stared silently into the distance, hoping, praying for an interruption. Finally, Donna cleared her throat.
‘How about Donna Moss and Joshua Lyman-’ she began
‘Donna?’ he asked softly.
‘-have great respect for each other, and regard themselves as close personal friends, but deny absolutely that there has ever been inappropriate conduct between them, or that they were engaged in a clandestine relationship during the time they worked at the White House’ she finished.
‘Donna.’ Slowly, Josh turned to face her, finally summoning the courage to look her in the eye.
‘What?’ she gave a frustrated sigh as she rose from her seat to retrieve her long forgotten coffee.
‘Are we going to talk about this?’ he asked, afraid of either answer.
‘About what?’ she was stalling and they both knew it.
‘About what was said tonight?’
‘No.’ Donna looked up from her coffee, shocked to find him staring at her intently.
‘Why not?’ he asked, slightly offended at her immediate dismissal. He stood up, moving away from the table slightly, and now they almost faced each other from opposite ends of the room.
‘You’re not ready to,’ she answered determinedly, stirring her tepid coffee to disguise the fact that her hands were shaking.
‘Excuse me?’ His voice rose significantly, pitching upwards in indignation.
‘Josh, you’re barely ready to accept the fact that I’m back in your life. You’re hardly ready to discuss the nature of our… relationship.’ She bowed her head and therefore missed the hurt expression that flashed across his face.
‘I just discussed the nature of our relationship in front of an entire room of campaign employees!’ Josh blustered, throwing his hands into the air. ‘I just had a discussion with Bruno Gianelli about the nature of our relationship!’
‘Exactly! You discussed it with everyone but me!’ she shot back, putting her coffee down on the boardroom table. ‘This is what you do, Josh, I get glimpses of everything and nothing with you.’
‘What the hell is that supposed to mean?’ he yelled, starting to walk towards her.
‘The grand gestures and then the cold shoulder is what I’m talking about!’ Donna yelled back. ‘You turn up at my door and fling snowballs at my window. You drop your entire workload and jump on a plane to Germany. Then I get relegated to finding your luggage or even better, the silent treatment!’ Donna stormed at him, months of anger rising to the surface.
‘Things were different then,’ he returned, throwing his hands out once more, before shoving them back into his pockets.
‘No, they weren’t! I’m still getting the on-off treatment from you! You tell me you miss me every day and then you ignore me! Well, I’m sick of it! Nothing has changed and you’re not ready to discuss anything!’
‘Donna…’ He raised a hand, trying to back off, to halt this discussion and steer it onto safer ground.
‘-nine years!’ she interrupted. Shaking with fury and frustration, Donna stared at him, her piercing blue eyes telling him everything, begging to be understood.
‘Nine years, what?’ he asked, confused by the rapid change in subject.
‘Nothing,’ she replied crossly, folding her arms in defiance as she turned away from him. But something about her angry glare made him want an answer, made him feel he deserved an answer so he circled around to face her.
‘No, damn it, tell me!’
‘I spent nine years being in love with you!’ She felt the tears well in her eyes but pushed through, refusing to let him see her cry. ‘I can’t and I won’t do that to myself again!’
So there it was, everything they hadn’t been brave enough to say before. Seeing Donna’s eyes were glistening with tears made Josh curse himself inwardly. He hated that he had caused that, and wanted nothing more right at that moment than to comfort her, tell her he was sorry, that he would fix this – but there were other things he needed to tell her first. He took a deep breath.
‘I know,’ he whispered.
‘Wha…What?’ she asked, incredulously.
‘I knew that,’ he repeated.
‘Then … why didn’t you say something?’ Donna was shaken. She felt as if she’d been slapped and she stepped back from him, almost as if to protect herself.
‘Because I couldn’t do anything about it,’ he said, matter of factly.
‘You mean you let me think…I schlepped around after you and put up with you mocking every man I ever dated. You used to call me from your girlfriends apartments because you wanted a chat and the whole time you KNEW HOW I FELT?’ Feelings of outrage and betrayal tore through Donna leaving her feeling bruised and raw.
‘We worked at the White House!’ Josh yelled, his anger rising to meet hers.
‘You don’t think I knew that? You think I was some …some deluded little assistant, with a crush on her boss? Can you…do you? ...You let me torture myself for nine years, Josh!’
‘I didn’t know what to do! What should I have done Donna?’
‘You could have told me!’ she shouted.
‘I couldn’t!’ he snapped back. A moment passed, and he sighed, leaning back against the table, feeling as though he needed physical support to continue. ‘Because if I’d told you then, it would have been real. Not saying anything, well, it kept it at bay.’ Frustrated, he raked his hand through his hair before continuing. ‘If I didn’t acknowledge it, it wasn’t there, and I wasn’t lying every day,’ he murmured, defeatedly.
A silence, heavy with revelation, descended for immeasurably long moments. Donna drew a breath and for the first time in, well, a long time, looked Josh directly in the eye.
‘Why would you have been lying every day?’ she asked softly, aware that she was standing on a precipice and that this moment could change everything.
‘Sorry?’
‘Why would you have been lying by telling me you knew how I felt?’ she persisted, gently. Josh sighed heavily, knowing they were finally here, at the point where misdirection and avoidance were useless, that only the truth would suffice. He shifted his weight, and eased himself away from the table, so they were standing inches from one another.
‘I would have been lying because I felt the same way. Because every morning, I managed to get up and convince myself you weren’t interested in me like that. Even when people were trying to tell me how you felt because they thought I was too blind or too stupid to notice,’ he shrugged. ‘I convinced myself of that, every day for nine years. It was easier than…’ he shook his head, rubbing his eyes wearily, not wanting to see her reaction.
Donna had no answer for a moment, nothing with which to counter Josh’s admission. Millions of thoughts ran through her mind, memories from the past, comments she had misinterpreted, feelings she had denied. In this one discussion, everything had been laid bare and now standing in this otherwise empty room with Josh not daring to look at her, Donna finally felt the pieces slide into place.
‘Easier than what, Josh?’ Her voice was little more than a whisper – her breathing quickened and she felt as though she really needed to sit down. Instead, she put a hand on the table to steady herself, waiting for him to answer her.
‘Easier than dealing with what might have…’ Still looking at the carpet, he started again. ‘One of the reasons I didn’t want to tell you how I felt was that I was scared.’ Josh began fidgeting nervously and suddenly Donna remembered the look in his eyes she’d sometimes noticed on those rare occasions she’d caught him looking at her. She’d seen it before – outside her apartment one snowy night, at the hospital in Germany, that afternoon in his office when he turned her away - but she’d never quite understood it. ‘Scared of everything that it would bring. What would have happened if I’d told you I had … feelings… for you, and you’d admitted to me that you felt the same? I don’t think I would have been able to resist you.’
Donna was stunned - she was sure her mouth must be hanging open. After all those years telling herself she mustn’t have those kinds of feelings for Josh, that he didn’t feel anything for her beyond friendship – he was telling her he’d struggled to keep his hands off of her? ‘What if we had had a relationship? Imagine the field day the press would have had with that. Donna, I ran through a thousand nightmare scenarios in my mind and I decided not telling you was the best thing I could do, to protect you.’ Josh looked at her earnestly, hoping she would understand the truth.
‘Josh,’ Donna half-smiled to herself and shook her head. ‘I hate to be the one to break it to you but the press is about to have a field day. It’s really sweet that you’d want to protect me, but I’m okay at protecting myself.’ She smiled at him, at long last reassuring him that she was all right, that his efforts on her behalf were understood.
‘I’d noticed.’ He grinned at her, a little uncertainly. ‘You really think we can spin this?’
‘Aspects of it, yeah, but other suggestions will be a little harder to defuse.’ Smiling, she avoided specifying what exactly she was concerned about – they both knew.
‘What did you say before?’ he asked, slowly switching gears.
‘About what?’ she reached for her notes.
‘The statement you wanted to use?’
‘Oh…um… Donna Moss and Joshua Lyman have been close friends and colleagues for many years.’ She tucked a stray blonde strand behind her ear, a more focused expression settling on her face. ‘They have great respect for each other, and regard themselves as close personal friends, but deny absolutely that there has ever been inappropriate conduct between them, or that they were engaged in a clandestine relationship during the time they worked at the White House.’
‘That’s good I guess,’ he replied. Donna glanced wearily at her watch and sighed.
‘I think we have to take this to the Congressman. It’s now … 2.30 in the morning and I don’t think it will help the situation if we’re all sleep deprived when issuing a rebuttal statement.’
‘Yeah, OK,’ he nodded, fatigue finally catching up with him. They both collected their various files, an easy silence falling between them.
Walking towards the closed door, Josh placed his hand gently on her arm. ‘Donna, we’re okay aren’t we?’
The expression in his eyes was intense, but there was a smile playing about the corner of his mouth that was irresistible, and she couldn’t help but smile back. ‘We’re getting there.’
Continue on to Part 4
Author: Finn AUS
Rating: PG-13 (swearing) - turns a little saucy in future parts so be warned!
Spoiler Info: Vaguely placed somewhere in Season Seven
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: After a Republican makes suggestions about Donna and Josh's relationship in an attempt to derail the campaign, it forces them both to face the real truth.
Author Note: A gold medal in the luge (cause that looks really hard and scary and so is my writing and grammar) to Caz, the beta of all beta's!
Feedback: Love it, crave it, need it, beg it!
Neither one could speak for fear of where this could go - fear of how far it had already gone. For a full five minutes both Donna and Josh stared silently into the distance, hoping, praying for an interruption. Finally, Donna cleared her throat.
‘How about Donna Moss and Joshua Lyman-’ she began
‘Donna?’ he asked softly.
‘-have great respect for each other, and regard themselves as close personal friends, but deny absolutely that there has ever been inappropriate conduct between them, or that they were engaged in a clandestine relationship during the time they worked at the White House’ she finished.
‘Donna.’ Slowly, Josh turned to face her, finally summoning the courage to look her in the eye.
‘What?’ she gave a frustrated sigh as she rose from her seat to retrieve her long forgotten coffee.
‘Are we going to talk about this?’ he asked, afraid of either answer.
‘About what?’ she was stalling and they both knew it.
‘About what was said tonight?’
‘No.’ Donna looked up from her coffee, shocked to find him staring at her intently.
‘Why not?’ he asked, slightly offended at her immediate dismissal. He stood up, moving away from the table slightly, and now they almost faced each other from opposite ends of the room.
‘You’re not ready to,’ she answered determinedly, stirring her tepid coffee to disguise the fact that her hands were shaking.
‘Excuse me?’ His voice rose significantly, pitching upwards in indignation.
‘Josh, you’re barely ready to accept the fact that I’m back in your life. You’re hardly ready to discuss the nature of our… relationship.’ She bowed her head and therefore missed the hurt expression that flashed across his face.
‘I just discussed the nature of our relationship in front of an entire room of campaign employees!’ Josh blustered, throwing his hands into the air. ‘I just had a discussion with Bruno Gianelli about the nature of our relationship!’
‘Exactly! You discussed it with everyone but me!’ she shot back, putting her coffee down on the boardroom table. ‘This is what you do, Josh, I get glimpses of everything and nothing with you.’
‘What the hell is that supposed to mean?’ he yelled, starting to walk towards her.
‘The grand gestures and then the cold shoulder is what I’m talking about!’ Donna yelled back. ‘You turn up at my door and fling snowballs at my window. You drop your entire workload and jump on a plane to Germany. Then I get relegated to finding your luggage or even better, the silent treatment!’ Donna stormed at him, months of anger rising to the surface.
‘Things were different then,’ he returned, throwing his hands out once more, before shoving them back into his pockets.
‘No, they weren’t! I’m still getting the on-off treatment from you! You tell me you miss me every day and then you ignore me! Well, I’m sick of it! Nothing has changed and you’re not ready to discuss anything!’
‘Donna…’ He raised a hand, trying to back off, to halt this discussion and steer it onto safer ground.
‘-nine years!’ she interrupted. Shaking with fury and frustration, Donna stared at him, her piercing blue eyes telling him everything, begging to be understood.
‘Nine years, what?’ he asked, confused by the rapid change in subject.
‘Nothing,’ she replied crossly, folding her arms in defiance as she turned away from him. But something about her angry glare made him want an answer, made him feel he deserved an answer so he circled around to face her.
‘No, damn it, tell me!’
‘I spent nine years being in love with you!’ She felt the tears well in her eyes but pushed through, refusing to let him see her cry. ‘I can’t and I won’t do that to myself again!’
So there it was, everything they hadn’t been brave enough to say before. Seeing Donna’s eyes were glistening with tears made Josh curse himself inwardly. He hated that he had caused that, and wanted nothing more right at that moment than to comfort her, tell her he was sorry, that he would fix this – but there were other things he needed to tell her first. He took a deep breath.
‘I know,’ he whispered.
‘Wha…What?’ she asked, incredulously.
‘I knew that,’ he repeated.
‘Then … why didn’t you say something?’ Donna was shaken. She felt as if she’d been slapped and she stepped back from him, almost as if to protect herself.
‘Because I couldn’t do anything about it,’ he said, matter of factly.
‘You mean you let me think…I schlepped around after you and put up with you mocking every man I ever dated. You used to call me from your girlfriends apartments because you wanted a chat and the whole time you KNEW HOW I FELT?’ Feelings of outrage and betrayal tore through Donna leaving her feeling bruised and raw.
‘We worked at the White House!’ Josh yelled, his anger rising to meet hers.
‘You don’t think I knew that? You think I was some …some deluded little assistant, with a crush on her boss? Can you…do you? ...You let me torture myself for nine years, Josh!’
‘I didn’t know what to do! What should I have done Donna?’
‘You could have told me!’ she shouted.
‘I couldn’t!’ he snapped back. A moment passed, and he sighed, leaning back against the table, feeling as though he needed physical support to continue. ‘Because if I’d told you then, it would have been real. Not saying anything, well, it kept it at bay.’ Frustrated, he raked his hand through his hair before continuing. ‘If I didn’t acknowledge it, it wasn’t there, and I wasn’t lying every day,’ he murmured, defeatedly.
A silence, heavy with revelation, descended for immeasurably long moments. Donna drew a breath and for the first time in, well, a long time, looked Josh directly in the eye.
‘Why would you have been lying every day?’ she asked softly, aware that she was standing on a precipice and that this moment could change everything.
‘Sorry?’
‘Why would you have been lying by telling me you knew how I felt?’ she persisted, gently. Josh sighed heavily, knowing they were finally here, at the point where misdirection and avoidance were useless, that only the truth would suffice. He shifted his weight, and eased himself away from the table, so they were standing inches from one another.
‘I would have been lying because I felt the same way. Because every morning, I managed to get up and convince myself you weren’t interested in me like that. Even when people were trying to tell me how you felt because they thought I was too blind or too stupid to notice,’ he shrugged. ‘I convinced myself of that, every day for nine years. It was easier than…’ he shook his head, rubbing his eyes wearily, not wanting to see her reaction.
Donna had no answer for a moment, nothing with which to counter Josh’s admission. Millions of thoughts ran through her mind, memories from the past, comments she had misinterpreted, feelings she had denied. In this one discussion, everything had been laid bare and now standing in this otherwise empty room with Josh not daring to look at her, Donna finally felt the pieces slide into place.
‘Easier than what, Josh?’ Her voice was little more than a whisper – her breathing quickened and she felt as though she really needed to sit down. Instead, she put a hand on the table to steady herself, waiting for him to answer her.
‘Easier than dealing with what might have…’ Still looking at the carpet, he started again. ‘One of the reasons I didn’t want to tell you how I felt was that I was scared.’ Josh began fidgeting nervously and suddenly Donna remembered the look in his eyes she’d sometimes noticed on those rare occasions she’d caught him looking at her. She’d seen it before – outside her apartment one snowy night, at the hospital in Germany, that afternoon in his office when he turned her away - but she’d never quite understood it. ‘Scared of everything that it would bring. What would have happened if I’d told you I had … feelings… for you, and you’d admitted to me that you felt the same? I don’t think I would have been able to resist you.’
Donna was stunned - she was sure her mouth must be hanging open. After all those years telling herself she mustn’t have those kinds of feelings for Josh, that he didn’t feel anything for her beyond friendship – he was telling her he’d struggled to keep his hands off of her? ‘What if we had had a relationship? Imagine the field day the press would have had with that. Donna, I ran through a thousand nightmare scenarios in my mind and I decided not telling you was the best thing I could do, to protect you.’ Josh looked at her earnestly, hoping she would understand the truth.
‘Josh,’ Donna half-smiled to herself and shook her head. ‘I hate to be the one to break it to you but the press is about to have a field day. It’s really sweet that you’d want to protect me, but I’m okay at protecting myself.’ She smiled at him, at long last reassuring him that she was all right, that his efforts on her behalf were understood.
‘I’d noticed.’ He grinned at her, a little uncertainly. ‘You really think we can spin this?’
‘Aspects of it, yeah, but other suggestions will be a little harder to defuse.’ Smiling, she avoided specifying what exactly she was concerned about – they both knew.
‘What did you say before?’ he asked, slowly switching gears.
‘About what?’ she reached for her notes.
‘The statement you wanted to use?’
‘Oh…um… Donna Moss and Joshua Lyman have been close friends and colleagues for many years.’ She tucked a stray blonde strand behind her ear, a more focused expression settling on her face. ‘They have great respect for each other, and regard themselves as close personal friends, but deny absolutely that there has ever been inappropriate conduct between them, or that they were engaged in a clandestine relationship during the time they worked at the White House.’
‘That’s good I guess,’ he replied. Donna glanced wearily at her watch and sighed.
‘I think we have to take this to the Congressman. It’s now … 2.30 in the morning and I don’t think it will help the situation if we’re all sleep deprived when issuing a rebuttal statement.’
‘Yeah, OK,’ he nodded, fatigue finally catching up with him. They both collected their various files, an easy silence falling between them.
Walking towards the closed door, Josh placed his hand gently on her arm. ‘Donna, we’re okay aren’t we?’
The expression in his eyes was intense, but there was a smile playing about the corner of his mouth that was irresistible, and she couldn’t help but smile back. ‘We’re getting there.’
Continue on to Part 4
West Wing Fan Fiction: Glimpses of Everything and Nothing 2/7
Title: Glimpses of Everything and Nothing - Part 2/7
Author: Finn AUS
Rating: PG-13 (swearing) - turns a little saucy in future parts so be warned!
Spoiler Info: Vaguely placed somewhere in Season Seven
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: After a Republican makes suggestions about Donna and Josh's relationship in an attempt to derail the campaign, it forces them both to face the real truth.
Author Note: Another continued heap of praise to Beta Caz for help me find Lou, showing me Santos and making sure Donna and Josh weren't constantly staring at each other for the first time! 'Beta the devil you know!'
Feedback: Love it, crave it, need it, beg it!
Josh sat in his car and exhaled deeply, running his hand over his face as he threw his head back against the headrest. The heat and anger he had felt since first reading the transcript of the interview was slowly ebbing away, although he suspected he would never be able to erase the indignation from his memory. This was what he had long been afraid of – sure, he knew there had been rumors about them for years, rumors he’d steadfastly ignored, but rarely had anything been said overtly, and certainly never on national television.
Starting the car, he realised that confronting Bruno had been easy. What he had to do next would be the hard part - going back to the office. Facing the assembled staff and working out a strategy to deal with this. They had to keep the focus on Santos, keep the press away from what many would see as a juicy political sex scandal… oh yeah this was gonna be a walk in the park.
Arriving back in the parking lot, he noticed there were more cars there than when he’d left, so clearly Lou was rallying the troops. The boardroom was buzzing as he stepped out of the elevator; he could hear raised voices and see people passing the transcript of the brief interview back and forth, looking for any weak spots on which they could mount a counter-attack.
Lou immediately stormed towards Josh, grabbed him roughly by the arm and dragged him into a corner.
‘Well, the dumbest guy in the Democratic Party returns!’ She glared at him, her hands thrown up in desperation. Clearly, she was seething at his rash departure.
‘You don’t believe in answering a phone?’ Lou jabbed a finger into Josh’s chest as she hissed at him.
‘No, not really.’ He rubbed a hand over his eyes and through his hair, starting to feel truly deflated. Thinking Lou was about to explode, he prepared himself for an ass kicking but she quickly changed tack, catching Josh off guard.
‘Are you a little saddle sore?’
‘Excuse me?’ His eyes snapped back open, as he wondered where this line of questioning was going.
‘From the big fat white horse you must have ridden over there on?’
‘Look-’
‘No you look! You took something that was a late night, low rating Friday night interview with Chucky Chuckison, the recently promoted weatherman and turned it into a national prime time exposé with Tim Russert!’ Lou leaned back slightly and paused long enough for Josh to slide around her and head off in search of coffee. But she followed him, clearly not impressed by his lack of response.
‘There weren’t any reporters there; no one saw me enter or leave.’ He attempted to blow her off with a casual wave of the arm.
‘Well that’s just dumb luck, isn’t it?’ Lou sighed heavily. She paused in the hallway, as Josh continued his march towards the coffee cart. Calming herself, she called to him.
‘Don’t you think there might have been a reason Donna didn’t give you the news transcripts? Do you think that maybe as a smart, intelligent professional, she may have guessed you’d react badly?’ He stopped, the coffee pot suspended in mid air, and stared off into space. Resolutely he poured the rest of his cup and turned to face her.
‘You know what Lou? I don’t care. You can’t suggest those kinds of things on television and not want anybody to hear it. You know everyone will be asking the question in the morning. They’re going after my staff and I won’t let that happen.’ Wearily, he began making his way back towards her.
‘Your staff? Or Donna?’ Lou saw him tense, a momentary flash that told her she’d got his attention.
‘It’s not about that,’ Josh raised his voice, becoming more irritated by the second and marched past her into the boardroom.
Lou flung her arms out in exasperation, and followed him. ‘You’re right! You probably are too stupid to ever admit to yourself that it’s not the same for everyone else.’
‘Lou, I’m warning you, don’t-’
‘You’ve got to know,’ she adopted a softer tone, ‘that because of what was said in that interview there was no way that you, of all people, should have gone over there tonight.’ She stared intently at him.
‘I’m really not in the mood for a lecture,’ he sighed, tired of her continual questioning.
‘OK,’ she paused. ‘So how about helping us plan a response?’ She motioned with her free hand towards the assembled staff.
‘Fine.’ He marched to the table and that’s when he spotted her. Standing defiantly in the corner, Donna was reading the transcript for what must be the hundredth time and making notes.
Setting down his cup, Josh flung himself into his familiar place at the head of the table, not waiting for others to sit before he began.
‘Right. We need to be aggressive with our response.’ He addressed the room, hoping to fool her into believing that he wasn’t as deeply affected by this as his sudden departure would seem to indicate. ‘I want to remove all doubt about Donna and her role in this campaign.’
‘That’s going to move us off our message,’ Bram countered.
‘What would you suggest?’ Josh shot back viciously.
‘What about scaling back her press conferences? Have a few other spokespeople so we can say she’s not the key spokesperson but one of many.’
‘That’s just going to make it seem like we’re admitting something,’ Lou offered. ‘Besides, Josh didn’t hire her – I did, and I certainly don’t have to justify my decision to anybody. But if it’ll help kill this story and keep us on track, I’ll go on record and make the details of her interview public.’
‘Yeah but that still doesn’t address the insinuations about their personal relationship. How do we get around that?’ Edie jumped in.
‘We can’t,’ Bram replied. ‘Half of Washington thinks it’s true.’ Josh leapt out of his chair at that, and began prowling around the room, running his hand through his hair, scratching the back of his head. He couldn’t believe it had come to this. A group of relative strangers were sitting here, calmly dissecting a relationship that had never existed. A relationship that he had denied himself for the last nine years, telling himself that it would be too complicated, that however much he needed her, desired her and loved her, it couldn’t be. So here they were, he and Donna, standing at opposite ends of a boardroom while others discussed and drafted various responses to the allegation that they were romantically involved. How ironic that it was a completely fictitious romance.
Temporarily lost in his thoughts, Josh realised that Lou was speaking again, and wrenched his attention back to the present.
‘Well we could mention the other relationships they’ve both had. Amy Gardner’s a public figure, maybe she’d consider…’
‘What?' Josh halted his pacing, desperately wanting to put an end to it all. ‘Getting back together to defend my ex-assistant? No way. This is goddamned ridiculous.’ Josh slammed his hand down the desk, fuming.
‘I agree.’ Donna’s determined voice startled everyone, because her silence had been taken for embarrassment. Allowing himself to look at her for the first time since his return from Bruno’s office, Josh saw no embarrassment or shame. Donna’s eyes were ablaze, a brilliant blue, her jaw set firmly and her head held high, and he knew she wasn’t cowering - she was gearing up for a fight. Preparing to defend herself against those unfounded accusations, especially that one untruth that cut the deepest.
‘What?’ Lou asked, uncharacteristically gentle, as if worried Donna would break under the strain. Josh turned from Lou to stare at her again, amazed at the woman he was seeing before him. He’d known for a long time that Donna had an inner strength that many didn’t see, but this confident professional display made him incredibly proud. Josh faced her, the beginnings of a smirk etched across his face, and as their eyes finally met he hoped she would see the pride and support he was desperately trying to project.
Caught off guard by the intensity of his expression, Donna fell back into their old pattern and looked away.
‘I agree with Josh, this is ridiculous,’ she said to no one in particular. ‘We can use this to our advantage so easily.’ People stared at her in dumbfounded silence, wondering how Donna could possibly see any of the accusations that had been levelled at her as something to be used to their advantage.
‘For years, Democrats - especially those from the North Eastern states – have been labelled elitist, morally superior, because of their Ivy League college degrees,’ she explained calmly. ‘This is the perfect chance to dispel that theory. Why not use this to say that everyone is welcome in the Democratic Party, that a person who is right for the job can’t be passed over just because they didn’t go to the right college or get the right degree?’ She placed the transcript onto the table and stepped forward further.
‘But Donna-’
‘Lou, I’m not saying that kids can be doctors because they’ve seen ER, or that because I really enjoyed Apollo 13 I’ll make a great astronaut. Some jobs will always require further education. I’m saying that certain jobs can require either a degree or experience from a candidate. Look at how many of the CEO’s of this country started on the factory floor. The last head of McDonalds was the fry boy when he started. Why not throw back that this assertion that my credentials are lacking came from an exclusive, discriminatory, and superior Republican candidate? We contrast that against the fact that Congressman Santos wants to encourage every American to seek out whatever job they dream of and remind voters that he will strive to ensure that they will not be restricted by glass ceilings. And we tell them that this presidential candidate is prepared to assist them in any way he can - be it job start programs or aggressive agendas - to relate job experience to college credits. The emphasis of our response must rest with the veil under which this whole attack was started – education.’ Donna spoke emphatically and for a moment there was silence.
Josh stared at her in awe, unable to stop the grin which was spreading across his face. Only hours earlier, Donna had been the victim of a malicious slander. Her credentials had been questioned, her ethics brought under the harsh light of public comment and her privacy invaded, yet here she stood, ready to pick up the gauntlet thrown by their opponents and use their accusations against them. Josh had never been more proud of her than at that moment, never more stunned by the woman she had become. His reverie was broken by Matt Santos strolling into the boardroom - having been standing at the door he had heard every word his Press Spokesperson had said.
‘I have no problem repeating that word for word on CNN, MSNBC and any other program that will listen if this thing blows up,’ he began, circling the room and stopping on the other side of the table. ‘Donna is completely right; the only way to fight back is with the good fight. They want us defending her morals, and focusing on the accusation that she slept her way into her jobs at the White House and on this campaign.’ Donna felt herself blushing at this, and she stole a glance at Josh, but his eyes were cast safely towards the floor, his hands firmly in his pockets.
Santos went on. ‘They will want us to produce documents of defence from everyone, have us scrambling to exonerate her. Well, I don’t know about the rest of you, but it seems to me that we shouldn’t be afraid to get out in front of this one. Lou, I want to see a draft statement as soon as possible – use as much as you can of what Donna said, but I’ll have some additions to make, so don’t lock it up completely, OK?’ He looked around at his assembled staff and nodded gently. ‘Now, can we have the room please?’
The room quickly cleared, as Santos gestured for both Donna and Josh to sit. Donna directed her attention towards the Congressman, desperate to look at anything but Josh, who was leaning back in his chair, hoping to appear calm and relaxed.
‘Well now, I had a feeling this was coming,’ Matt Santos cleared his throat.
‘Sir, I want to apologise for any-’
‘Donna, don’t you dare. Don’t you ever apologise for any of it. If you weren’t right for the job, you wouldn’t be here. If this supposed … ‘entanglement’… between you had hindered your work, neither of you would be here.’ Donna bowed her head at the mention of an entanglement, hiding her reddening cheeks whilst Josh inwardly groaned and closed his eyes.
‘The thing is, whilst defending your lack of formal education will be simple, and I’m looking forward to it - I have to agree with Bram. You must both be aware that there have been rumors about the nature of your relationship for years. The general consensus seems to be that something is going on.’ Josh looked at him then, defensively, but Santos raised a cautionary hand. ‘I don’t care either way, but we need something to run with, so you will both stay in this room until you can come out and give us a line concerning your personal relationship that we can use - and no Josh, I will not accept no comment. Sort it out,’ he said and closed the boardroom door gently behind him, an embarrassed silence settling in his wake.
Continue on to Part 3
Author: Finn AUS
Rating: PG-13 (swearing) - turns a little saucy in future parts so be warned!
Spoiler Info: Vaguely placed somewhere in Season Seven
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: After a Republican makes suggestions about Donna and Josh's relationship in an attempt to derail the campaign, it forces them both to face the real truth.
Author Note: Another continued heap of praise to Beta Caz for help me find Lou, showing me Santos and making sure Donna and Josh weren't constantly staring at each other for the first time! 'Beta the devil you know!'
Feedback: Love it, crave it, need it, beg it!
Josh sat in his car and exhaled deeply, running his hand over his face as he threw his head back against the headrest. The heat and anger he had felt since first reading the transcript of the interview was slowly ebbing away, although he suspected he would never be able to erase the indignation from his memory. This was what he had long been afraid of – sure, he knew there had been rumors about them for years, rumors he’d steadfastly ignored, but rarely had anything been said overtly, and certainly never on national television.
Starting the car, he realised that confronting Bruno had been easy. What he had to do next would be the hard part - going back to the office. Facing the assembled staff and working out a strategy to deal with this. They had to keep the focus on Santos, keep the press away from what many would see as a juicy political sex scandal… oh yeah this was gonna be a walk in the park.
Arriving back in the parking lot, he noticed there were more cars there than when he’d left, so clearly Lou was rallying the troops. The boardroom was buzzing as he stepped out of the elevator; he could hear raised voices and see people passing the transcript of the brief interview back and forth, looking for any weak spots on which they could mount a counter-attack.
Lou immediately stormed towards Josh, grabbed him roughly by the arm and dragged him into a corner.
‘Well, the dumbest guy in the Democratic Party returns!’ She glared at him, her hands thrown up in desperation. Clearly, she was seething at his rash departure.
‘You don’t believe in answering a phone?’ Lou jabbed a finger into Josh’s chest as she hissed at him.
‘No, not really.’ He rubbed a hand over his eyes and through his hair, starting to feel truly deflated. Thinking Lou was about to explode, he prepared himself for an ass kicking but she quickly changed tack, catching Josh off guard.
‘Are you a little saddle sore?’
‘Excuse me?’ His eyes snapped back open, as he wondered where this line of questioning was going.
‘From the big fat white horse you must have ridden over there on?’
‘Look-’
‘No you look! You took something that was a late night, low rating Friday night interview with Chucky Chuckison, the recently promoted weatherman and turned it into a national prime time exposé with Tim Russert!’ Lou leaned back slightly and paused long enough for Josh to slide around her and head off in search of coffee. But she followed him, clearly not impressed by his lack of response.
‘There weren’t any reporters there; no one saw me enter or leave.’ He attempted to blow her off with a casual wave of the arm.
‘Well that’s just dumb luck, isn’t it?’ Lou sighed heavily. She paused in the hallway, as Josh continued his march towards the coffee cart. Calming herself, she called to him.
‘Don’t you think there might have been a reason Donna didn’t give you the news transcripts? Do you think that maybe as a smart, intelligent professional, she may have guessed you’d react badly?’ He stopped, the coffee pot suspended in mid air, and stared off into space. Resolutely he poured the rest of his cup and turned to face her.
‘You know what Lou? I don’t care. You can’t suggest those kinds of things on television and not want anybody to hear it. You know everyone will be asking the question in the morning. They’re going after my staff and I won’t let that happen.’ Wearily, he began making his way back towards her.
‘Your staff? Or Donna?’ Lou saw him tense, a momentary flash that told her she’d got his attention.
‘It’s not about that,’ Josh raised his voice, becoming more irritated by the second and marched past her into the boardroom.
Lou flung her arms out in exasperation, and followed him. ‘You’re right! You probably are too stupid to ever admit to yourself that it’s not the same for everyone else.’
‘Lou, I’m warning you, don’t-’
‘You’ve got to know,’ she adopted a softer tone, ‘that because of what was said in that interview there was no way that you, of all people, should have gone over there tonight.’ She stared intently at him.
‘I’m really not in the mood for a lecture,’ he sighed, tired of her continual questioning.
‘OK,’ she paused. ‘So how about helping us plan a response?’ She motioned with her free hand towards the assembled staff.
‘Fine.’ He marched to the table and that’s when he spotted her. Standing defiantly in the corner, Donna was reading the transcript for what must be the hundredth time and making notes.
Setting down his cup, Josh flung himself into his familiar place at the head of the table, not waiting for others to sit before he began.
‘Right. We need to be aggressive with our response.’ He addressed the room, hoping to fool her into believing that he wasn’t as deeply affected by this as his sudden departure would seem to indicate. ‘I want to remove all doubt about Donna and her role in this campaign.’
‘That’s going to move us off our message,’ Bram countered.
‘What would you suggest?’ Josh shot back viciously.
‘What about scaling back her press conferences? Have a few other spokespeople so we can say she’s not the key spokesperson but one of many.’
‘That’s just going to make it seem like we’re admitting something,’ Lou offered. ‘Besides, Josh didn’t hire her – I did, and I certainly don’t have to justify my decision to anybody. But if it’ll help kill this story and keep us on track, I’ll go on record and make the details of her interview public.’
‘Yeah but that still doesn’t address the insinuations about their personal relationship. How do we get around that?’ Edie jumped in.
‘We can’t,’ Bram replied. ‘Half of Washington thinks it’s true.’ Josh leapt out of his chair at that, and began prowling around the room, running his hand through his hair, scratching the back of his head. He couldn’t believe it had come to this. A group of relative strangers were sitting here, calmly dissecting a relationship that had never existed. A relationship that he had denied himself for the last nine years, telling himself that it would be too complicated, that however much he needed her, desired her and loved her, it couldn’t be. So here they were, he and Donna, standing at opposite ends of a boardroom while others discussed and drafted various responses to the allegation that they were romantically involved. How ironic that it was a completely fictitious romance.
Temporarily lost in his thoughts, Josh realised that Lou was speaking again, and wrenched his attention back to the present.
‘Well we could mention the other relationships they’ve both had. Amy Gardner’s a public figure, maybe she’d consider…’
‘What?' Josh halted his pacing, desperately wanting to put an end to it all. ‘Getting back together to defend my ex-assistant? No way. This is goddamned ridiculous.’ Josh slammed his hand down the desk, fuming.
‘I agree.’ Donna’s determined voice startled everyone, because her silence had been taken for embarrassment. Allowing himself to look at her for the first time since his return from Bruno’s office, Josh saw no embarrassment or shame. Donna’s eyes were ablaze, a brilliant blue, her jaw set firmly and her head held high, and he knew she wasn’t cowering - she was gearing up for a fight. Preparing to defend herself against those unfounded accusations, especially that one untruth that cut the deepest.
‘What?’ Lou asked, uncharacteristically gentle, as if worried Donna would break under the strain. Josh turned from Lou to stare at her again, amazed at the woman he was seeing before him. He’d known for a long time that Donna had an inner strength that many didn’t see, but this confident professional display made him incredibly proud. Josh faced her, the beginnings of a smirk etched across his face, and as their eyes finally met he hoped she would see the pride and support he was desperately trying to project.
Caught off guard by the intensity of his expression, Donna fell back into their old pattern and looked away.
‘I agree with Josh, this is ridiculous,’ she said to no one in particular. ‘We can use this to our advantage so easily.’ People stared at her in dumbfounded silence, wondering how Donna could possibly see any of the accusations that had been levelled at her as something to be used to their advantage.
‘For years, Democrats - especially those from the North Eastern states – have been labelled elitist, morally superior, because of their Ivy League college degrees,’ she explained calmly. ‘This is the perfect chance to dispel that theory. Why not use this to say that everyone is welcome in the Democratic Party, that a person who is right for the job can’t be passed over just because they didn’t go to the right college or get the right degree?’ She placed the transcript onto the table and stepped forward further.
‘But Donna-’
‘Lou, I’m not saying that kids can be doctors because they’ve seen ER, or that because I really enjoyed Apollo 13 I’ll make a great astronaut. Some jobs will always require further education. I’m saying that certain jobs can require either a degree or experience from a candidate. Look at how many of the CEO’s of this country started on the factory floor. The last head of McDonalds was the fry boy when he started. Why not throw back that this assertion that my credentials are lacking came from an exclusive, discriminatory, and superior Republican candidate? We contrast that against the fact that Congressman Santos wants to encourage every American to seek out whatever job they dream of and remind voters that he will strive to ensure that they will not be restricted by glass ceilings. And we tell them that this presidential candidate is prepared to assist them in any way he can - be it job start programs or aggressive agendas - to relate job experience to college credits. The emphasis of our response must rest with the veil under which this whole attack was started – education.’ Donna spoke emphatically and for a moment there was silence.
Josh stared at her in awe, unable to stop the grin which was spreading across his face. Only hours earlier, Donna had been the victim of a malicious slander. Her credentials had been questioned, her ethics brought under the harsh light of public comment and her privacy invaded, yet here she stood, ready to pick up the gauntlet thrown by their opponents and use their accusations against them. Josh had never been more proud of her than at that moment, never more stunned by the woman she had become. His reverie was broken by Matt Santos strolling into the boardroom - having been standing at the door he had heard every word his Press Spokesperson had said.
‘I have no problem repeating that word for word on CNN, MSNBC and any other program that will listen if this thing blows up,’ he began, circling the room and stopping on the other side of the table. ‘Donna is completely right; the only way to fight back is with the good fight. They want us defending her morals, and focusing on the accusation that she slept her way into her jobs at the White House and on this campaign.’ Donna felt herself blushing at this, and she stole a glance at Josh, but his eyes were cast safely towards the floor, his hands firmly in his pockets.
Santos went on. ‘They will want us to produce documents of defence from everyone, have us scrambling to exonerate her. Well, I don’t know about the rest of you, but it seems to me that we shouldn’t be afraid to get out in front of this one. Lou, I want to see a draft statement as soon as possible – use as much as you can of what Donna said, but I’ll have some additions to make, so don’t lock it up completely, OK?’ He looked around at his assembled staff and nodded gently. ‘Now, can we have the room please?’
The room quickly cleared, as Santos gestured for both Donna and Josh to sit. Donna directed her attention towards the Congressman, desperate to look at anything but Josh, who was leaning back in his chair, hoping to appear calm and relaxed.
‘Well now, I had a feeling this was coming,’ Matt Santos cleared his throat.
‘Sir, I want to apologise for any-’
‘Donna, don’t you dare. Don’t you ever apologise for any of it. If you weren’t right for the job, you wouldn’t be here. If this supposed … ‘entanglement’… between you had hindered your work, neither of you would be here.’ Donna bowed her head at the mention of an entanglement, hiding her reddening cheeks whilst Josh inwardly groaned and closed his eyes.
‘The thing is, whilst defending your lack of formal education will be simple, and I’m looking forward to it - I have to agree with Bram. You must both be aware that there have been rumors about the nature of your relationship for years. The general consensus seems to be that something is going on.’ Josh looked at him then, defensively, but Santos raised a cautionary hand. ‘I don’t care either way, but we need something to run with, so you will both stay in this room until you can come out and give us a line concerning your personal relationship that we can use - and no Josh, I will not accept no comment. Sort it out,’ he said and closed the boardroom door gently behind him, an embarrassed silence settling in his wake.
Continue on to Part 3
West Wing Fan Fiction: Glimpses of Everything and Nothing
Title: Glimpses of Everything and Nothing - Part 1/7
Author: Published as Finn AUS
Rating: PG-13 (swearing) - turns a little saucy in future parts so be warned!
Spoiler Info: Vaguely placed somewhere in Season Seven
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: After a Republican makes suggestions about Donna and Josh's relationship in an attempt to derail the campaign, it forces them both to face the real truth.
Author Note 1: This story started as a response to the Take Out Menu Challenge set by Clannadlvrs late last year. I had to use the phrase 'did your RNC membership card come with a one way ticket to Hades?' and someone runs a red light.
A/N 2: The biggest, most massive, shout-out to Caz my beta! For her awesome feedback and direction, her ability to Americanise vocab and her love of Josh/Donna saucy-ness. 'Things can only get beta!'
Feedback: Love it, crave it, need it, beg it!
A taxi would have been far too slow for him; would have allowed the voice of reason to creep in and at this very moment Josh wanted no part of it. The small piece of his brain that was still capable of rational thought realised that he was actually glad to be in DC right at this moment. Glad, because it meant ready access to his car; because it meant he could indulge his fury by over-revving the engine and skidding round corners whilst driving wildly over the speed-limit. His fingers gripped the steering wheel tightly as he replayed the earlier allegations over and over in his head.
The chill of early fall hung in the air and the nights were drawing in, but Josh barely registered either fact. Until now he'd been lost, his focus was the campaign, everything was about the campaign - until tonight. Which is why he was tearing through the wide open streets of DC; cursing at corners that slowed his progress. Storming ahead, approaching the intersection of K and 12th streets, he saw the light begin changing to red - amber first - taunting him, daring him. He began to slow and almost immediately felt his anger start to dissipate - but he wasn't ready to let it go. Gently easing off the accelerator, he advanced apprehensively - not willing to stop - and glanced up and down 12th. Seeing no oncoming traffic, he stamped on the gas and floored his somewhat neglected Lexus through the red light.
Josh had been glad to be back in DC - it was home, after all - and the familiarity of the streets brought an odd sort of comfort. That feeling however, was far outweighed by his fury at what had happened earlier that evening. Josh was shattered that it had happened here - his home, he reflected ruefully - where public perception was everything and the truth often counted for nothing. A town fuelled by innuendo and rumor, where thinly veiled attacks in the form of education debate, meant something else entirely. It had to happen here of course - in this political hot bed where it would quickly become an issue, a distraction from the real emphasis of the campaign and here, where it would wound the most.
His phone began ringing again, for the umpteenth time since he had stormed from his office in rage. He knew who was calling and had a pretty good idea of what they wanted to say, but right now he didn't want to hear it.
He swung onto 11th street realising that ahead wasn't an option because it was one way traffic. Cutting onto Mass. Ave. he saw the office ahead, the posters screaming his name, the ribbons blowing in the stiff breeze. Josh slammed on the brakes and roared to a stop in front of the building. The usual gaggle of reporters had long gone, needing to meet their deadlines, but Josh wouldn't have cared if they had been standing ten deep at the door. He marched up to the security guard who was looking edgy, obviously alerted by Josh's dramatic entrance that he might not be here on a social visit.
'Yes sir?' he asked, his left hand resting on his gun. Not that he expected to need it - this man in a suit looked more emotionally distressed than threatening - but why not remind him he had a weapon?
'Josh Lyman for Bruno Gianelli, and no I don't have an appointment but tell him if he doesn't see me now, I'll try my luck at the CNN studios down the road.'
Josh paced violently, thrusting his hands deeply into his pockets as the security guard repeated the request into the phone, word for word. After a short interval, the guard waved Josh through and he marched forward to the elevators, knowing exactly which floor he was looking for. The floors ticked by and at Level 4 the doors sprung open to reveal a dark, expansive office. The back rooms were bathed in a soft glow and Josh headed purposefully towards them. As he wove his way through the many deserted cubicles, all adorned with Vinnick merchandise, he felt almost physically ill. He strode into the boardroom, looking angrily around for the reason for this late-night visit.
There, sitting calmly, almost angelically at the boardroom table, a coffee mug within easy reach, sat Bruno, a smug contented smile spread across his face. For a moment Josh could only stare in disgust.
'I was just wondering Bruno,' he began casually, 'did your RNC membership card come with a one way ticket to Hades?' He stalked around the room, slowly, deliberately, not at all like the normally frantic campaign manager Bruno knew.
'Did they also provide the return envelope in which you could mail back your soul?' Josh's voice rumbled with a barely suppressed rage, Bruno noticing a steel edge that revealed how serious he was.
'Josh-' Bruno attempted immediately to subdue him.
'You wanna start this? You really want to start this?' Josh challenged, placing his hands carefully on the back of the chair in front of him.
'Good to see you on this side of town Josh-'
'You know what Bruno? Years ago, I almost bought it. I almost believed that you were this above-partisanship-for-the-sake-of-the-country-find-the-right-person-for-the-job guy. Not true though, you're just like everyone else. You just want to win, but you're worse, you'll sink to any level.' Pushing himself away from the chair, Josh began to pace on his side of the table, not taking his eyes from Bruno's face.
'Josh, I don't know what you think is going on, or what you think happened.' Bruno again attempted to quell Josh's rage with condescension, wanting to remain in control.
'I know exactly what happened.' Josh interrupted, halting briefly and turning to face him head on once more 'One of your low level, disposable congressmen went on national television and took a shot at Donna.'
'Really? That's news to me.' Continuing to look smug, Bruno rose from his seat, attempting with hands raised gently in mock surrender, to convey how unaware he was.
'That's crap!' Josh realised his voice was getting louder now, but right at that moment, he didn't care about being overheard. He knew he should care, but the idea that he should have to think about appearances at a time like this served only to infuriate him further. 'At least be man enough to own it! Your little lap dog is pushing a statement you'd never get Vinnick to say because it makes him look cheap and dirty! How dare you play this card!'
'How dare I what, Josh?' Deciding that the time for denial was over, Bruno finally launched his counter-attack. His manner calm and aloof, he approached Josh slowly, halting just a few steps in front of him. 'No one ever said politics was fair. I'm not here to come second. You're right I want to win, that's what I was hired to do. I see a way to do that, I'm going after it.'
'And that includes making slanderous statements?' Josh turned away from Bruno and started pacing again, but what came next stopped him as effectually as if he'd been slapped in the face.
'What did he say that was a lie?' Bruno spoke quietly, deliberately, wanting to make sure his words had the desired effect. Silence ricocheted around the room, Josh's glare speaking louder than words.
'Excuse me?' Josh remained still, hands firmly on his hips, the edge to his voice returning.
'What statement was a lie?' Bruno asked again. 'Has Donna ever completed a degree in anything? Has Donna ever had any experience besides being your assistant, on a national campaign? Did Donna get the job as your assistant by going through any formal interview process? Have there been questions raised before about the nature of your relationship?' Looking totally relaxed as he spoke, Bruno leant gently back against the window sill and folded his arms across his chest. He sighed heavily, wanting Josh to feel as if he was being schooled in the art of political warfare. 'Josh, I understand you're upset, in fact it's what I planned on. I want you off your game.'
'You're a total son of a bitch, you know that?' Josh growled. 'You're the man who pushed his way onto a lifeboat when women and children were dying on the Titanic. You're the man who sold the Nazis information about where Jews were hiding in Europe. You disgust me and when I win, when I absolutely nail your boss, I'll make sure to let every one know just how much of a son of a bitch you are.' Josh had moved towards the window and was now mere inches from Bruno's face. His voice was low but had a dangerous snarl to it that not even Bruno could pretend to ignore. For a moment, Bruno thought Josh was about to speak again, but he didn't. Disgusted, he simply spun on his heel and headed for the door.
'They already know,' Bruno said to Josh's back. Josh stopped in his tracks, and standing at the door, slowly turned and faced Bruno once more. Silence hung in the air for a moment then Josh stared directly at him, his eyes blazing, his hands driven fiercely into his pockets.
'You know what?' Josh spoke so quietly now, that Bruno almost had to strain to hear him. 'Do it. Come after Donna. 'Cause that'll give me a reason to come back at you with everything I've got. And believe me, you won't know what's hit you, because the difference between you and me, Bruno, is that I'll do it right.'
Continue on to Part 2
Author: Published as Finn AUS
Rating: PG-13 (swearing) - turns a little saucy in future parts so be warned!
Spoiler Info: Vaguely placed somewhere in Season Seven
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: After a Republican makes suggestions about Donna and Josh's relationship in an attempt to derail the campaign, it forces them both to face the real truth.
Author Note 1: This story started as a response to the Take Out Menu Challenge set by Clannadlvrs late last year. I had to use the phrase 'did your RNC membership card come with a one way ticket to Hades?' and someone runs a red light.
A/N 2: The biggest, most massive, shout-out to Caz my beta! For her awesome feedback and direction, her ability to Americanise vocab and her love of Josh/Donna saucy-ness. 'Things can only get beta!'
Feedback: Love it, crave it, need it, beg it!
A taxi would have been far too slow for him; would have allowed the voice of reason to creep in and at this very moment Josh wanted no part of it. The small piece of his brain that was still capable of rational thought realised that he was actually glad to be in DC right at this moment. Glad, because it meant ready access to his car; because it meant he could indulge his fury by over-revving the engine and skidding round corners whilst driving wildly over the speed-limit. His fingers gripped the steering wheel tightly as he replayed the earlier allegations over and over in his head.
The chill of early fall hung in the air and the nights were drawing in, but Josh barely registered either fact. Until now he'd been lost, his focus was the campaign, everything was about the campaign - until tonight. Which is why he was tearing through the wide open streets of DC; cursing at corners that slowed his progress. Storming ahead, approaching the intersection of K and 12th streets, he saw the light begin changing to red - amber first - taunting him, daring him. He began to slow and almost immediately felt his anger start to dissipate - but he wasn't ready to let it go. Gently easing off the accelerator, he advanced apprehensively - not willing to stop - and glanced up and down 12th. Seeing no oncoming traffic, he stamped on the gas and floored his somewhat neglected Lexus through the red light.
Josh had been glad to be back in DC - it was home, after all - and the familiarity of the streets brought an odd sort of comfort. That feeling however, was far outweighed by his fury at what had happened earlier that evening. Josh was shattered that it had happened here - his home, he reflected ruefully - where public perception was everything and the truth often counted for nothing. A town fuelled by innuendo and rumor, where thinly veiled attacks in the form of education debate, meant something else entirely. It had to happen here of course - in this political hot bed where it would quickly become an issue, a distraction from the real emphasis of the campaign and here, where it would wound the most.
His phone began ringing again, for the umpteenth time since he had stormed from his office in rage. He knew who was calling and had a pretty good idea of what they wanted to say, but right now he didn't want to hear it.
He swung onto 11th street realising that ahead wasn't an option because it was one way traffic. Cutting onto Mass. Ave. he saw the office ahead, the posters screaming his name, the ribbons blowing in the stiff breeze. Josh slammed on the brakes and roared to a stop in front of the building. The usual gaggle of reporters had long gone, needing to meet their deadlines, but Josh wouldn't have cared if they had been standing ten deep at the door. He marched up to the security guard who was looking edgy, obviously alerted by Josh's dramatic entrance that he might not be here on a social visit.
'Yes sir?' he asked, his left hand resting on his gun. Not that he expected to need it - this man in a suit looked more emotionally distressed than threatening - but why not remind him he had a weapon?
'Josh Lyman for Bruno Gianelli, and no I don't have an appointment but tell him if he doesn't see me now, I'll try my luck at the CNN studios down the road.'
Josh paced violently, thrusting his hands deeply into his pockets as the security guard repeated the request into the phone, word for word. After a short interval, the guard waved Josh through and he marched forward to the elevators, knowing exactly which floor he was looking for. The floors ticked by and at Level 4 the doors sprung open to reveal a dark, expansive office. The back rooms were bathed in a soft glow and Josh headed purposefully towards them. As he wove his way through the many deserted cubicles, all adorned with Vinnick merchandise, he felt almost physically ill. He strode into the boardroom, looking angrily around for the reason for this late-night visit.
There, sitting calmly, almost angelically at the boardroom table, a coffee mug within easy reach, sat Bruno, a smug contented smile spread across his face. For a moment Josh could only stare in disgust.
'I was just wondering Bruno,' he began casually, 'did your RNC membership card come with a one way ticket to Hades?' He stalked around the room, slowly, deliberately, not at all like the normally frantic campaign manager Bruno knew.
'Did they also provide the return envelope in which you could mail back your soul?' Josh's voice rumbled with a barely suppressed rage, Bruno noticing a steel edge that revealed how serious he was.
'Josh-' Bruno attempted immediately to subdue him.
'You wanna start this? You really want to start this?' Josh challenged, placing his hands carefully on the back of the chair in front of him.
'Good to see you on this side of town Josh-'
'You know what Bruno? Years ago, I almost bought it. I almost believed that you were this above-partisanship-for-the-sake-of-the-country-find-the-right-person-for-the-job guy. Not true though, you're just like everyone else. You just want to win, but you're worse, you'll sink to any level.' Pushing himself away from the chair, Josh began to pace on his side of the table, not taking his eyes from Bruno's face.
'Josh, I don't know what you think is going on, or what you think happened.' Bruno again attempted to quell Josh's rage with condescension, wanting to remain in control.
'I know exactly what happened.' Josh interrupted, halting briefly and turning to face him head on once more 'One of your low level, disposable congressmen went on national television and took a shot at Donna.'
'Really? That's news to me.' Continuing to look smug, Bruno rose from his seat, attempting with hands raised gently in mock surrender, to convey how unaware he was.
'That's crap!' Josh realised his voice was getting louder now, but right at that moment, he didn't care about being overheard. He knew he should care, but the idea that he should have to think about appearances at a time like this served only to infuriate him further. 'At least be man enough to own it! Your little lap dog is pushing a statement you'd never get Vinnick to say because it makes him look cheap and dirty! How dare you play this card!'
'How dare I what, Josh?' Deciding that the time for denial was over, Bruno finally launched his counter-attack. His manner calm and aloof, he approached Josh slowly, halting just a few steps in front of him. 'No one ever said politics was fair. I'm not here to come second. You're right I want to win, that's what I was hired to do. I see a way to do that, I'm going after it.'
'And that includes making slanderous statements?' Josh turned away from Bruno and started pacing again, but what came next stopped him as effectually as if he'd been slapped in the face.
'What did he say that was a lie?' Bruno spoke quietly, deliberately, wanting to make sure his words had the desired effect. Silence ricocheted around the room, Josh's glare speaking louder than words.
'Excuse me?' Josh remained still, hands firmly on his hips, the edge to his voice returning.
'What statement was a lie?' Bruno asked again. 'Has Donna ever completed a degree in anything? Has Donna ever had any experience besides being your assistant, on a national campaign? Did Donna get the job as your assistant by going through any formal interview process? Have there been questions raised before about the nature of your relationship?' Looking totally relaxed as he spoke, Bruno leant gently back against the window sill and folded his arms across his chest. He sighed heavily, wanting Josh to feel as if he was being schooled in the art of political warfare. 'Josh, I understand you're upset, in fact it's what I planned on. I want you off your game.'
'You're a total son of a bitch, you know that?' Josh growled. 'You're the man who pushed his way onto a lifeboat when women and children were dying on the Titanic. You're the man who sold the Nazis information about where Jews were hiding in Europe. You disgust me and when I win, when I absolutely nail your boss, I'll make sure to let every one know just how much of a son of a bitch you are.' Josh had moved towards the window and was now mere inches from Bruno's face. His voice was low but had a dangerous snarl to it that not even Bruno could pretend to ignore. For a moment, Bruno thought Josh was about to speak again, but he didn't. Disgusted, he simply spun on his heel and headed for the door.
'They already know,' Bruno said to Josh's back. Josh stopped in his tracks, and standing at the door, slowly turned and faced Bruno once more. Silence hung in the air for a moment then Josh stared directly at him, his eyes blazing, his hands driven fiercely into his pockets.
'You know what?' Josh spoke so quietly now, that Bruno almost had to strain to hear him. 'Do it. Come after Donna. 'Cause that'll give me a reason to come back at you with everything I've got. And believe me, you won't know what's hit you, because the difference between you and me, Bruno, is that I'll do it right.'
Continue on to Part 2
West Wing Fan Fiction: Noticing in Grief
Title: Noticing in Grief
Author: Published as Finn AUS
Rating: G
Spoiler Info: Loosely related to events that may take place during/after Election Day Pt 2
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: As grief sweeps through the campaign and the White House, more people begin to notice Josh and Donna's new relationship.
Author Note 1: After the lovely feedback from the first Noticing and many people wanting to see how other West Wingers would find out, this came to me after seeing the preview for Election Day Pt 2.
A/N 2: Thanks and love to Caz, the beta of all beta’s who is always constructive, always helpful and always supportive.
Feedback: Would love it, really and truly.
Leo noticed – but only because he literally walked in on it. He’d managed to free himself from the stranglehold that Annabeth had on his day, with plans to rest for twenty minutes. The corridors of the hotel were crowded and as he headed to his hotel room, a large part of him was glad this was finally over. He decided to take the stairs - it was only one flight after all and he’d been feeling great all day. Sleep deprived, but hell, kids twenty years younger than him were falling over at the finish line.
They’d sprung apart like teenagers and although he’d actually seen nothing at all, their body language and guilt ridden faces told him everything.
‘Well, it’s about damn time,’ Leo smiled and then marched straight past Donna and Josh. He’d made it to the first flight and then turned back to Josh, who was smiling at him.
‘You did good kid, you did good.’ Leo looked at him tenderly, nodding his head almost imperceptibly. Josh could only beam at him in return, words between them unnecessary. As Leo headed up the next flight of stairs, he reminded himself to call Jed Bartlet – that man owed him 50 bucks.
Helen noticed – but only because she recognized the self sacrificing grief Donna was going through. It was etched across her face – her normally pale complexion turned ashen as she kept back unshed tears. It was sheer determination to hold it together, to stand straighter, to speak clearer and be more resolute than anyone else. Helen knew, absolutely knew it was not an effort to appear professional. It was to be the pillar of strength he needed, the shoulder on which he could lean. She was the one person who could on some level fathom the world of pain Josh was in. They all sat in silence, the eerily white hospital walls reflecting back at them, and as she briefly caught Donna’s eye, Helen understood that Donna was there for Josh, completely.
Matt noticed – but only because he’d coincidentally headed to the same location as Josh. For some unknown reason, it seemed to beckon to him and he realized he needed to say a private farewell. He stood in the empty living room of Leo’s suite and listened to the initially hushed voices coming from the bedroom. He hadn’t meant to stay, to intrude on this private moment between them, but he couldn’t move. Their voices rose with passion and pain and then Josh’s cracked - and Matt knew he was broken. It was then he slowly eased away, the agony of not only losing Leo but losing some part of Josh now resting heavily in his heart.
CJ noticed – but only because she was glancing to the side to discreetly wipe a tear from her cheek. It was moments before Josh, the President and others would carry Leo from the church and he stood across the aisle from her, with a number of Santos’ staffers. She’d barely had time to speak to him or Donna over the past few days. The White House was sombre and she doubted that laughter would return before President Bartlet walked out of the building for the last time. Still - she saw it. Donna had slipped her hand into Josh’s during the service and to any outsider it would seem inconsequential, yet CJ knew. Their fingers were intertwined, an equal show of support - and as the congregation sat down, she watched Josh squeeze Donna’s hand and offer it back to her. The look they shared spoke volumes in the surrounding silence. It spoke of offered relief, of love, of assurance and a shared decision to always be there to hold a hand in support.
Abbey noticed – but only because she was almost as worried about Josh as she was about Jed. These two men who had formed the friend and son circle around Leo were now exposed and open. Abbey knew she could be there for Jed but her fear for Josh had been building for days. He’d been away from the White House for a long time now, but the rumors about his edginess had made their way back to her. She’d been worried that this event would send him spiraling out of control - until she noticed. They had gone back to the residence after the ceremony, and were talking quietly amongst themselves when Abbey saw Donna whisper tenderly into Josh’s ear and watched as he gazed back at her. They looked at each other for a long moment, until they were interrupted by a slender young woman with short dark hair. Abbey knew then that while Josh wouldn’t come through emotionally unscathed, he would at least be looked after, cared for, loved.
Danny noticed – but only because he’d swung by the press room as the paper’s photographer was excitedly waiting for him, telling him there was a photo he needed to see. The photo was taken from a batch featuring the guests departing the funeral earlier. It was a simple moment of grief, of intense privacy between two people who were clearly in love. They stood removed from the group, Josh obviously needing to catch his breath. He was leaning gently into her embrace; she was wiping tears away from his cheeks. Their bodies were pressed to each other, as if physical contact could provide a deeper well of strength. The next image was heartbreakingly beautiful. A kiss – to provide solace, a home for him to return to should the grief threaten to overwhelm him.
‘Hey Danny! You gotta see this,’ the photographer enthused, pointing to the screen.
‘Delete it.’ Danny’s voice was clear and low.
‘What?’
‘Delete it,’ he repeated.
‘Look, I know you and he go way back Danny, but you can’t order me around. This is news, two high profile Santos’ employees are messing around. This could be a huge story,’
‘Delete the photos. Forget you took them. If I ever see them printed anywhere -anywhere at all - I will have you fired.’
Jed noticed – but only because he’d left the wake to walk the halls and found them sitting in Will’s office. They sat on the couch, Donna’s head resting on Josh’s shoulder, his hand gently stroking the hair across her forehead. They were completely comfortable in each other’s presence - they weren’t speaking but they didn’t need to, their body language spoke volumes. Jed strolled into the office.
‘Mr. President,’ they both rose immediately.
‘Please … please sit down,’ he waved them back to the couch while he leaned against Will’s desk. He said nothing for a moment, just stared at the carpet. Suddenly he reached into his pocket and removed a crisp 50 dollar bill.
‘I owe Leo this, Josh and I think you should take it on his behalf,’ he passed the bill towards him. Josh accepted the money, confused.
‘Thank you sir, but I’m not sure I understand.’
‘He and I had a bet … about … the two of you. He said you’d figure it out before the Election and I said afterwards.’ Jed smiled at the memory. ‘He called me, that day, boasting about how his boy had just snuck in under the wire.’ Donna raised her eyebrows and squeezed Josh’s hand.
‘Josh, you know…he…we’re…’ the President couldn’t say it.
‘I know sir,’ Josh whispered.
Josh noticed – but only because he’d been noticing for nine years. It was here in the lobby as they left the wake, heading home shadowed by life-changing grief that she turned to him, her blue eyes glistening with tears.
‘This hole you’re in… the walls are steep. But hey, I’ve been down here before and I know the way out.’
Author: Published as Finn AUS
Rating: G
Spoiler Info: Loosely related to events that may take place during/after Election Day Pt 2
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: As grief sweeps through the campaign and the White House, more people begin to notice Josh and Donna's new relationship.
Author Note 1: After the lovely feedback from the first Noticing and many people wanting to see how other West Wingers would find out, this came to me after seeing the preview for Election Day Pt 2.
A/N 2: Thanks and love to Caz, the beta of all beta’s who is always constructive, always helpful and always supportive.
Feedback: Would love it, really and truly.
Leo noticed – but only because he literally walked in on it. He’d managed to free himself from the stranglehold that Annabeth had on his day, with plans to rest for twenty minutes. The corridors of the hotel were crowded and as he headed to his hotel room, a large part of him was glad this was finally over. He decided to take the stairs - it was only one flight after all and he’d been feeling great all day. Sleep deprived, but hell, kids twenty years younger than him were falling over at the finish line.
They’d sprung apart like teenagers and although he’d actually seen nothing at all, their body language and guilt ridden faces told him everything.
‘Well, it’s about damn time,’ Leo smiled and then marched straight past Donna and Josh. He’d made it to the first flight and then turned back to Josh, who was smiling at him.
‘You did good kid, you did good.’ Leo looked at him tenderly, nodding his head almost imperceptibly. Josh could only beam at him in return, words between them unnecessary. As Leo headed up the next flight of stairs, he reminded himself to call Jed Bartlet – that man owed him 50 bucks.
Helen noticed – but only because she recognized the self sacrificing grief Donna was going through. It was etched across her face – her normally pale complexion turned ashen as she kept back unshed tears. It was sheer determination to hold it together, to stand straighter, to speak clearer and be more resolute than anyone else. Helen knew, absolutely knew it was not an effort to appear professional. It was to be the pillar of strength he needed, the shoulder on which he could lean. She was the one person who could on some level fathom the world of pain Josh was in. They all sat in silence, the eerily white hospital walls reflecting back at them, and as she briefly caught Donna’s eye, Helen understood that Donna was there for Josh, completely.
Matt noticed – but only because he’d coincidentally headed to the same location as Josh. For some unknown reason, it seemed to beckon to him and he realized he needed to say a private farewell. He stood in the empty living room of Leo’s suite and listened to the initially hushed voices coming from the bedroom. He hadn’t meant to stay, to intrude on this private moment between them, but he couldn’t move. Their voices rose with passion and pain and then Josh’s cracked - and Matt knew he was broken. It was then he slowly eased away, the agony of not only losing Leo but losing some part of Josh now resting heavily in his heart.
CJ noticed – but only because she was glancing to the side to discreetly wipe a tear from her cheek. It was moments before Josh, the President and others would carry Leo from the church and he stood across the aisle from her, with a number of Santos’ staffers. She’d barely had time to speak to him or Donna over the past few days. The White House was sombre and she doubted that laughter would return before President Bartlet walked out of the building for the last time. Still - she saw it. Donna had slipped her hand into Josh’s during the service and to any outsider it would seem inconsequential, yet CJ knew. Their fingers were intertwined, an equal show of support - and as the congregation sat down, she watched Josh squeeze Donna’s hand and offer it back to her. The look they shared spoke volumes in the surrounding silence. It spoke of offered relief, of love, of assurance and a shared decision to always be there to hold a hand in support.
Abbey noticed – but only because she was almost as worried about Josh as she was about Jed. These two men who had formed the friend and son circle around Leo were now exposed and open. Abbey knew she could be there for Jed but her fear for Josh had been building for days. He’d been away from the White House for a long time now, but the rumors about his edginess had made their way back to her. She’d been worried that this event would send him spiraling out of control - until she noticed. They had gone back to the residence after the ceremony, and were talking quietly amongst themselves when Abbey saw Donna whisper tenderly into Josh’s ear and watched as he gazed back at her. They looked at each other for a long moment, until they were interrupted by a slender young woman with short dark hair. Abbey knew then that while Josh wouldn’t come through emotionally unscathed, he would at least be looked after, cared for, loved.
Danny noticed – but only because he’d swung by the press room as the paper’s photographer was excitedly waiting for him, telling him there was a photo he needed to see. The photo was taken from a batch featuring the guests departing the funeral earlier. It was a simple moment of grief, of intense privacy between two people who were clearly in love. They stood removed from the group, Josh obviously needing to catch his breath. He was leaning gently into her embrace; she was wiping tears away from his cheeks. Their bodies were pressed to each other, as if physical contact could provide a deeper well of strength. The next image was heartbreakingly beautiful. A kiss – to provide solace, a home for him to return to should the grief threaten to overwhelm him.
‘Hey Danny! You gotta see this,’ the photographer enthused, pointing to the screen.
‘Delete it.’ Danny’s voice was clear and low.
‘What?’
‘Delete it,’ he repeated.
‘Look, I know you and he go way back Danny, but you can’t order me around. This is news, two high profile Santos’ employees are messing around. This could be a huge story,’
‘Delete the photos. Forget you took them. If I ever see them printed anywhere -anywhere at all - I will have you fired.’
Jed noticed – but only because he’d left the wake to walk the halls and found them sitting in Will’s office. They sat on the couch, Donna’s head resting on Josh’s shoulder, his hand gently stroking the hair across her forehead. They were completely comfortable in each other’s presence - they weren’t speaking but they didn’t need to, their body language spoke volumes. Jed strolled into the office.
‘Mr. President,’ they both rose immediately.
‘Please … please sit down,’ he waved them back to the couch while he leaned against Will’s desk. He said nothing for a moment, just stared at the carpet. Suddenly he reached into his pocket and removed a crisp 50 dollar bill.
‘I owe Leo this, Josh and I think you should take it on his behalf,’ he passed the bill towards him. Josh accepted the money, confused.
‘Thank you sir, but I’m not sure I understand.’
‘He and I had a bet … about … the two of you. He said you’d figure it out before the Election and I said afterwards.’ Jed smiled at the memory. ‘He called me, that day, boasting about how his boy had just snuck in under the wire.’ Donna raised her eyebrows and squeezed Josh’s hand.
‘Josh, you know…he…we’re…’ the President couldn’t say it.
‘I know sir,’ Josh whispered.
Josh noticed – but only because he’d been noticing for nine years. It was here in the lobby as they left the wake, heading home shadowed by life-changing grief that she turned to him, her blue eyes glistening with tears.
‘This hole you’re in… the walls are steep. But hey, I’ve been down here before and I know the way out.’
Friday, April 8, 2011
West Wing Fan Fiction: Noticing
Title: Noticing
Author: Published as Finn AUS
Rating: PG 13 (suggested situations)
Spoiler Info: Takes place loosely after The Cold
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: Josh and Donna’s new relationship is noticed by a few people…or not.
Author Note 1: This is a just short post ep - I thought of whilst travelling for work and being stuck in an airport. Human interaction is always so interesting…
A/N 2: Massive thanks to my star beta Caz. She’s knows her stuff!!
Feedback: Love it like that KISS, and also the look Josh gives Donna across the table before the key swap.
Bram noticed - which was ironic considering he wasn’t really paying that much attention. In fact, he’d been wondering how much trouble it would have caused had he called that undies girl and invited her back to his room. Probably quite a bit. Still, as he was staring into space waiting for the carousel to deliver his luggage so they could all jump into an overcrowded mini-van and head to the Houston Sheraton, he saw it. Donna was returning a few messages, standing only a few feet from him across the carousel and Bram could tell she was tense. She marched back and forth, her free hand gesticulating wildly. After a few more words that he couldn’t hear, she snapped the phone shut in disgust and stared angrily at the belt that lay motionless, holding their luggage hostage. That’s when he saw it. Josh appeared almost out of nowhere and leaned toward her - closer than was strictly necessary - and whispered something into her ear. Her eyes lit up and she smiled tenderly, looking back into his beaming grin. Bram spotted Josh’s hand placed discreetly on Donna’s back and noticed the way Donna had immediately relaxed in his presence. It struck him as odd; but as the thought hit him, the carousel began to move and as he spotted his luggage, the thought vanished.
Lou noticed - and she was definitely not the type of person to pay attention to triviality. It was pure chance that she happened to be looking in that direction. Like a school group heading to camp, they were lined up along the kerb awaiting the arrival of their transportation. It arrived with a speedy flourish and everyone began reaching for their hand luggage. As Lou reached for the handle of the case sitting next to her on the sidewalk, Donna pushed down the handle of hers, which was when Lou spotted it. Josh’s bracelet – the beads he’d been wearing with his watch were now on Donna’s wrist. She knew they were Josh’s because the first time she’d noticed them months ago, she’d taken special care to mock him about them. He’d never struck her as a bead wearer but she’d noticed them one day when he’d reached across to pour himself a coffee one day. Now, here they were on Donna’s wrist. Just as she began to wonder the cars arrived, everyone began moving towards them and she moved onto other things in her head.
Ronna noticed - and she was distractedly staring out the window at the passing houses. After they’d piled into the Suburbans, an unusual silence had descended. With only one more day left in the campaign, at times like this there wasn’t much to say and talking for the sake of talking seemed too much of an effort. So Ronna had taken to gazing out the window, imagining the lives going on behind the doors of the passing Houston residences. It was a sunny afternoon and the reflection of the other passengers was mirrored onto her window. Donna was sitting opposite her, with Josh on her right - and that’s when Ronna saw it, in the reflection of the window. His fingers gently grazed Donna’s thigh in a very un-boss like way. Donna’s fingers reached out to his and for a moment Ronna watched as they wrestled playfully back and forth. Just as she turned her head to see the reality rather than the reflection, the van pulled into the drive of the Sheraton drive and Ronna began wondering how quickly she could escape to her hotel room.
Otto noticed - but only because his mind often wandered into the gutter when not focused on work. Checking into the Santos floor, the team waited as room keys were dispensed. As the clerk handed Donna her key, he announced her room number.
‘Okay Miss Moss, that’s floor seven and room number 69.’
Josh choked and turning his head away to face the courtyard, coughed loudly. Still Otto noticed the grin that spread across Josh’s face and glancing at Donna, saw her cheeks flush with embarrassment. But the thought left his head as quickly as it had entered it when he was handed his own room key.
Edie noticed - but only because she’d left her cell at the check in desk. She’d dumped her bags onto the bed and reached into her jacket pocket for her cell but immediately realised it wasn’t there. Damn – she’d put it down at the desk when she’d reached for her driver’s licence. That relaxing bath she’d promised herself would have to wait. Leaving her room, she rounded the corner into the main corridor of the Santos floor – and that was when she saw Josh - standing in the hallway, being dragged by his tie into a room. He was laughing playfully and Edie couldn’t decide if it was that, or the fact that he was actually getting some action which shocked her more. Walking past the now closed door, Edie wondered who was in Room 69.
Lester noticed - but only because Donna was never late. As the assembled group sat at the table, just thirty minutes after they had all checked in, they were all staring at one another waiting for Josh to appear. He’d called the meeting, after all. Still, Lester noticed that Donna was absent – usually she would be here first, pen at the ready, ideas formulated and ready to leap to into action. Lou finally took charge and began the meeting, and it was at that moment that Lester noticed Donna circle around the tables in the bar and rush to join them. She looked flushed and harried, and apologised profusely as she sat down. Lou continued on and nobody gave it any further thought. After going through everything that needed to be worked out and discussing a few plans, everyone decided to order a drink. Lester decided that Josh must have been called away to an important meeting, when he appeared, cell pressed to his ear having what seemed to be a enjoyable conversation with someone. He snapped it shut and sat down next to Donna, apologising for his tardiness and blaming an important call with Congressman Santos.
‘Hey Donna, those beads are really nice,’ Ronna commented.
‘Thanks,’ Donna smiled shyly.
‘Excuse me, what room can I charge this to?’ the waiter interrupted, placing Donna’s drink in front of her.
‘Make it mine. Moss. Room 69,’ Donna responded.
‘Josh, that was the Congressman,’ Lou moved to stand by Josh’s chair. ‘He wanted to make sure we’d all arrived as he hadn’t heard from you.’
‘Thanks.’ Josh was oddly quiet.
‘I actually need to call Mrs Santos about a few things. I’ll catch up for dinner in about an hour.’ Donna smiled as she rose from her seat and walked away. A few murmurs about what they might have for dinner led to a general ‘meat versus seafood’ discussion, and after a few minutes, Josh excused himself with a sigh.
‘I guess I should call the Congressman. Excuse me.’ Josh left a generous tip and strode out of the bar.
Everyone sat in silence, sipping their drinks, wondering what the next 72 hours would bring. They all felt so tired that it was hard to focus … difficult to really notice anything.
Author: Published as Finn AUS
Rating: PG 13 (suggested situations)
Spoiler Info: Takes place loosely after The Cold
Disclaimer: WB, NBC, Aaron Sorkin are the masterminds, John Wells is the minor-mind who had the good fortune to co-produce. I have no money, and even less with the US conversion rate so really not worth it.
Archiving permission: Awesome, please let me know so I can go look!
Summary: Josh and Donna’s new relationship is noticed by a few people…or not.
Author Note 1: This is a just short post ep - I thought of whilst travelling for work and being stuck in an airport. Human interaction is always so interesting…
A/N 2: Massive thanks to my star beta Caz. She’s knows her stuff!!
Feedback: Love it like that KISS, and also the look Josh gives Donna across the table before the key swap.
Bram noticed - which was ironic considering he wasn’t really paying that much attention. In fact, he’d been wondering how much trouble it would have caused had he called that undies girl and invited her back to his room. Probably quite a bit. Still, as he was staring into space waiting for the carousel to deliver his luggage so they could all jump into an overcrowded mini-van and head to the Houston Sheraton, he saw it. Donna was returning a few messages, standing only a few feet from him across the carousel and Bram could tell she was tense. She marched back and forth, her free hand gesticulating wildly. After a few more words that he couldn’t hear, she snapped the phone shut in disgust and stared angrily at the belt that lay motionless, holding their luggage hostage. That’s when he saw it. Josh appeared almost out of nowhere and leaned toward her - closer than was strictly necessary - and whispered something into her ear. Her eyes lit up and she smiled tenderly, looking back into his beaming grin. Bram spotted Josh’s hand placed discreetly on Donna’s back and noticed the way Donna had immediately relaxed in his presence. It struck him as odd; but as the thought hit him, the carousel began to move and as he spotted his luggage, the thought vanished.
Lou noticed - and she was definitely not the type of person to pay attention to triviality. It was pure chance that she happened to be looking in that direction. Like a school group heading to camp, they were lined up along the kerb awaiting the arrival of their transportation. It arrived with a speedy flourish and everyone began reaching for their hand luggage. As Lou reached for the handle of the case sitting next to her on the sidewalk, Donna pushed down the handle of hers, which was when Lou spotted it. Josh’s bracelet – the beads he’d been wearing with his watch were now on Donna’s wrist. She knew they were Josh’s because the first time she’d noticed them months ago, she’d taken special care to mock him about them. He’d never struck her as a bead wearer but she’d noticed them one day when he’d reached across to pour himself a coffee one day. Now, here they were on Donna’s wrist. Just as she began to wonder the cars arrived, everyone began moving towards them and she moved onto other things in her head.
Ronna noticed - and she was distractedly staring out the window at the passing houses. After they’d piled into the Suburbans, an unusual silence had descended. With only one more day left in the campaign, at times like this there wasn’t much to say and talking for the sake of talking seemed too much of an effort. So Ronna had taken to gazing out the window, imagining the lives going on behind the doors of the passing Houston residences. It was a sunny afternoon and the reflection of the other passengers was mirrored onto her window. Donna was sitting opposite her, with Josh on her right - and that’s when Ronna saw it, in the reflection of the window. His fingers gently grazed Donna’s thigh in a very un-boss like way. Donna’s fingers reached out to his and for a moment Ronna watched as they wrestled playfully back and forth. Just as she turned her head to see the reality rather than the reflection, the van pulled into the drive of the Sheraton drive and Ronna began wondering how quickly she could escape to her hotel room.
Otto noticed - but only because his mind often wandered into the gutter when not focused on work. Checking into the Santos floor, the team waited as room keys were dispensed. As the clerk handed Donna her key, he announced her room number.
‘Okay Miss Moss, that’s floor seven and room number 69.’
Josh choked and turning his head away to face the courtyard, coughed loudly. Still Otto noticed the grin that spread across Josh’s face and glancing at Donna, saw her cheeks flush with embarrassment. But the thought left his head as quickly as it had entered it when he was handed his own room key.
Edie noticed - but only because she’d left her cell at the check in desk. She’d dumped her bags onto the bed and reached into her jacket pocket for her cell but immediately realised it wasn’t there. Damn – she’d put it down at the desk when she’d reached for her driver’s licence. That relaxing bath she’d promised herself would have to wait. Leaving her room, she rounded the corner into the main corridor of the Santos floor – and that was when she saw Josh - standing in the hallway, being dragged by his tie into a room. He was laughing playfully and Edie couldn’t decide if it was that, or the fact that he was actually getting some action which shocked her more. Walking past the now closed door, Edie wondered who was in Room 69.
Lester noticed - but only because Donna was never late. As the assembled group sat at the table, just thirty minutes after they had all checked in, they were all staring at one another waiting for Josh to appear. He’d called the meeting, after all. Still, Lester noticed that Donna was absent – usually she would be here first, pen at the ready, ideas formulated and ready to leap to into action. Lou finally took charge and began the meeting, and it was at that moment that Lester noticed Donna circle around the tables in the bar and rush to join them. She looked flushed and harried, and apologised profusely as she sat down. Lou continued on and nobody gave it any further thought. After going through everything that needed to be worked out and discussing a few plans, everyone decided to order a drink. Lester decided that Josh must have been called away to an important meeting, when he appeared, cell pressed to his ear having what seemed to be a enjoyable conversation with someone. He snapped it shut and sat down next to Donna, apologising for his tardiness and blaming an important call with Congressman Santos.
‘Hey Donna, those beads are really nice,’ Ronna commented.
‘Thanks,’ Donna smiled shyly.
‘Excuse me, what room can I charge this to?’ the waiter interrupted, placing Donna’s drink in front of her.
‘Make it mine. Moss. Room 69,’ Donna responded.
‘Josh, that was the Congressman,’ Lou moved to stand by Josh’s chair. ‘He wanted to make sure we’d all arrived as he hadn’t heard from you.’
‘Thanks.’ Josh was oddly quiet.
‘I actually need to call Mrs Santos about a few things. I’ll catch up for dinner in about an hour.’ Donna smiled as she rose from her seat and walked away. A few murmurs about what they might have for dinner led to a general ‘meat versus seafood’ discussion, and after a few minutes, Josh excused himself with a sigh.
‘I guess I should call the Congressman. Excuse me.’ Josh left a generous tip and strode out of the bar.
Everyone sat in silence, sipping their drinks, wondering what the next 72 hours would bring. They all felt so tired that it was hard to focus … difficult to really notice anything.
West Wing Fan Fiction: Unsent Letters
Title: Unsent Letters
Rated: PG for thoughts and ideas.
Summary: The unsent letters in Josh's Personal Folder
Disclaimer: These are Aaron Sorkin's creative genius characters, that John Wells has hijacked. I am just borrowing them for a little bit and will return them when I'm done
Feedback: Crave and adore feedback
Author Notes: In Shutdown, Josh almost let Donna use his laptop. He decided against it after remembering his Personal Folder. So what follows is what I imagine is in Josh's Personal Folder.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep A Proportional Response
I drink from the keg of glory, Donna. Bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land.
I love that you tolerate me.
You stand there and let me rant, knowing I need to let it out before moving on. I behave completely inappropriately sometimes and order you to fetch me lunch. I boast of my successes and you tolerate me, without ever letting me go too far.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Five Votes Down
You won our award for best gift valued over twenty-five dollars on the financial disclosure report.
I love that you mock me.
That sometimes I do and say incredibly stupid things and you instead of becoming infuriated, you choose to mock me.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep The Crackpots & These Women
Donald hasn't called me yet.
I love that you involve me.
Though I outwardly hate it, I want to know. I want to hear their names and know their faces. I detest the way they treat you, these gomers that float in and out of your life. If they knew you for half the woman you are…
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Mr Willis of Ohio
I want my money back.
I love your freshness.
Your ability to see the world in completely unique way. A small incident can change your day, simply because you care and pay attention. Your first discovery brings a newness to documents I've heard time and time over. I wait excitedly as you discover more and more.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep The Short List
You should be nice to me. I could be dead, you know.
I love you that put me at ease.
That in your mind the possibility of me interviewing you would be uncomfortable and your first thought was my discomfort, not your own. You ease me by allaying my fears, that my completely nonsensical ramblings of falling ceilings are idiotic. You show me the ground when my feet drift from it.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep In Excelsis Deo
If one of us were in trouble, he would be the first person
I love your compassion.
Your first thought was to stand and defend someone who was in trouble. You propelled me into action when I felt shocked into stillness.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Take Out the Trash Day
He likes it beyond well done--he likes it burnt.
I love that know you my order.
It's a small intimacy but it reminds me, that you know the small stuff and it matters to you. Not matters, but you know me enough.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Take This Sabbath Day
And then wrestling in dirt?
I love you stand me at all.
In my state of awfulness, when some one else would walk away, and say too hard. You dig in and stand up. You take charge of me and let me know that without you, I am a ship without sail. Even when I am wearing fisherman's pants.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep 20 Hours in LA
I'm a real big fan, David, not just a Johnny-come-lately. It's not just Baywatch and Knight Rider with me.
I love your enthusiasm.
Whether it be for life to be lived, for me to move forward or for David Hasselhoff. You are not embarrassed or shamed by your enthusiasm. It shines outwards from your eyes and I am but lucky to stand beside you.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep The White House Pro Am
I'm adaptable.
I love that you can get out of hand.
That you can still make me blush. What would your sexual desire be
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Let Bartlet Be Barlet
I'm really not in the mood to mess around.
I love your spunk.
You stand toe to toe with me and you know just how far to push. You call me baby and walk away with a smile. You don't fear me in any way.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Mandatory Minimums
It's his regular Tuesday suit.
I love that you know my suits.
It's another small intimacy, but it means you know. It's such a strange idiosyncrasy, and I feel immature for continuing it but by acknowledging it, you make me feel special. As if you run a mental checklist of all the things you…of me.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep What Kind of Day Has It Been
Shots fired, shots fired!
I love that you weren't there.
I couldn't have that happen. Not to you. I sat there, alone and I saw you. Chaos reigned supreme around me, yet I was still. I couldn't speak, couldn't move to let others know but I saw you. You were with me, for that small moment and the greatest relief I had that night was not being found by Toby but realizing that you weren't actually there. If anything ever happened…
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: During Ep In the Shadow of Two Gunmen Pt 2
Why not?
Who was that girl? Coming back from a meeting today, I found a young blonde girl answering my phone. After a brief conversation it seems she had taken it upon herself to appoint herself as my assistant. I immediately recognized her refugee status. She was fleeing a bad relationship, a free riding medical student. Still I felt nothing but annoyance, I wanted her gone, I had things to do. In a hope of dismissing her, I told her this place was no rebuilding platform for people, no confidence Oprah Winfrey embrace session – well I hope I was more eloquent than that. I figured she'd been gone, either embarrassed or shocked, best result: both. She turned to me, and with the fiercest blue eyes and streak of spirit I have seen, she asked me why? Why it couldn't be a place to start a new? And I knew she was completely right. This fresh as a daisy, Wisconsin raised (I won't think about that), plucky student, stood in my office and convinced me with one sentence what this campaign should be about.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The Midterms
You made fun of the rules.
I love that you protect me.
Even if it's from myself, you put yourself in people's faces who would ordinarily scare others. You stayed with me, for three months and let time help me through. No kid gloves or special treatment, you respected for who I am and how I process things.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The Lame Duck Congress
I'm a beard.
I love that you see in small things a heart.
The most inconsequential, low ranking report can spark your interest and instead of dismissal, you see people. Names and faces, people and their suffering, and you take the truth of what the White House stands for and want to help. All the while knowing, that little can be done with the little that with we have, but also knowing that you are not the person who should decide what equals a greater pain. Even if it's pinching!
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The Portland Trip
Because I say so.
I love that dress.
I spent hours after you left, staring at my desk. Piles of work glared back at me but nothing. I couldn't escape how my breath caught in my throat when I saw you properly for the first time, how the entire night my mind wondered what you were doing, how utterly relieved I was when you came back unsatisfied. But what, more than anything troubled me was my conversation with Matt Skinner. He was advocating a bill that would basically declare certain types of love lawful and others not. It wasn't the gay community that I thought about, but selfishly myself. I have no capacity of understanding, to process what would happen if someone forbid me to love you. While silence and secrecy prevail, I know one day, I will tell you. Heaven help anyone, government or individual if they told me my love was illegal.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep Noel
I'm tuned to you.
I love that you guessed.
I was drowning, and I could see no escape, and felt foolish to ask for help. The sirens would continue ringing, and my breath was shallow and I was back there, sitting alone. How could I ask for help? But you saw something. Was it that I couldn't look at you? For fear of falling apart. Was it my terse responses? An attempt to redirect my anger, from myself to others. Was it the blood that flowed from my hand? You saw it and said nothing to me, but somehow you knew. In the darkness that was closing in, you reached out to me, gently showing me the light. You saved me and for that I am eternally grateful.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The Leadership Breakfast
She sent a note.
I love your embarrassment.
The sheer look of horror was priceless. I laughed for days and in no means at you. A more sympathetic laugh, for your ability to get into the most preposterous situations yet still retain a sensibility about you.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The War at Home
You fired me twice already tonight--I'm impervious.
I love your misdirection.
I know the feeling, and while denying it vehmently to anyone who ever mentions it in my presence, I know the feeling. What makes it incredible is the possibility that Joey's right. That the number one pollster in the country may have correctly counted a poll that was never taken. How do you manage? Do you struggle daily as I do? For your sake, I hope not - for my own, I hope so.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep 17 People
Stop remembering that.
I love that you left him.
While I may mock you, I may mock him and make light of the entire event, you should never doubt how proud I am of you. For being brave enough to leave him, for being brave enough to come back to me. For being brave enough to recently tell me the truth. To this very day, I will never understand how someone could focus on anything with you in the hospital. Minor scrap or not, I simply don't believe it possible. No red light would stop me either, is what I wanted to reply. If only…
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep Bad Moon Rising
AA's definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
I love your reasoning.
You look at situations and often pick an unpopular choice and ask why? Asking questions that while help prove my point, many people shy away from asking. Congressman, lobbyists, economists – many wanted to ask me the same question you asked today but you were the only one brave enough to say it. To not be afraid to be wrong, just wanting to know why? Wanting a reason.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep 18th & Potomac
If everybody out there takes it the way she did, we may be okay.
I love your response.
Everyone felt betrayed, hurt, and lied to. You felt compassion, sorrow and love. Your only thoughts were for the President and how he felt, how this would affect him. How amazingly selfless you are, to not focus on what may come for you. How this terrible lie could have you jobless in mere months. I learn so much from you every day and can never acknowledge it. Today I learnt from you what it meant to be a human being first and political operative second.
Rated: PG for thoughts and ideas.
Summary: The unsent letters in Josh's Personal Folder
Disclaimer: These are Aaron Sorkin's creative genius characters, that John Wells has hijacked. I am just borrowing them for a little bit and will return them when I'm done
Feedback: Crave and adore feedback
Author Notes: In Shutdown, Josh almost let Donna use his laptop. He decided against it after remembering his Personal Folder. So what follows is what I imagine is in Josh's Personal Folder.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep A Proportional Response
I drink from the keg of glory, Donna. Bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land.
I love that you tolerate me.
You stand there and let me rant, knowing I need to let it out before moving on. I behave completely inappropriately sometimes and order you to fetch me lunch. I boast of my successes and you tolerate me, without ever letting me go too far.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Five Votes Down
You won our award for best gift valued over twenty-five dollars on the financial disclosure report.
I love that you mock me.
That sometimes I do and say incredibly stupid things and you instead of becoming infuriated, you choose to mock me.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep The Crackpots & These Women
Donald hasn't called me yet.
I love that you involve me.
Though I outwardly hate it, I want to know. I want to hear their names and know their faces. I detest the way they treat you, these gomers that float in and out of your life. If they knew you for half the woman you are…
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Mr Willis of Ohio
I want my money back.
I love your freshness.
Your ability to see the world in completely unique way. A small incident can change your day, simply because you care and pay attention. Your first discovery brings a newness to documents I've heard time and time over. I wait excitedly as you discover more and more.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep The Short List
You should be nice to me. I could be dead, you know.
I love you that put me at ease.
That in your mind the possibility of me interviewing you would be uncomfortable and your first thought was my discomfort, not your own. You ease me by allaying my fears, that my completely nonsensical ramblings of falling ceilings are idiotic. You show me the ground when my feet drift from it.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep In Excelsis Deo
If one of us were in trouble, he would be the first person
I love your compassion.
Your first thought was to stand and defend someone who was in trouble. You propelled me into action when I felt shocked into stillness.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Take Out the Trash Day
He likes it beyond well done--he likes it burnt.
I love that know you my order.
It's a small intimacy but it reminds me, that you know the small stuff and it matters to you. Not matters, but you know me enough.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Take This Sabbath Day
And then wrestling in dirt?
I love you stand me at all.
In my state of awfulness, when some one else would walk away, and say too hard. You dig in and stand up. You take charge of me and let me know that without you, I am a ship without sail. Even when I am wearing fisherman's pants.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep 20 Hours in LA
I'm a real big fan, David, not just a Johnny-come-lately. It's not just Baywatch and Knight Rider with me.
I love your enthusiasm.
Whether it be for life to be lived, for me to move forward or for David Hasselhoff. You are not embarrassed or shamed by your enthusiasm. It shines outwards from your eyes and I am but lucky to stand beside you.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep The White House Pro Am
I'm adaptable.
I love that you can get out of hand.
That you can still make me blush. What would your sexual desire be
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Let Bartlet Be Barlet
I'm really not in the mood to mess around.
I love your spunk.
You stand toe to toe with me and you know just how far to push. You call me baby and walk away with a smile. You don't fear me in any way.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep Mandatory Minimums
It's his regular Tuesday suit.
I love that you know my suits.
It's another small intimacy, but it means you know. It's such a strange idiosyncrasy, and I feel immature for continuing it but by acknowledging it, you make me feel special. As if you run a mental checklist of all the things you…of me.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post-Ep What Kind of Day Has It Been
Shots fired, shots fired!
I love that you weren't there.
I couldn't have that happen. Not to you. I sat there, alone and I saw you. Chaos reigned supreme around me, yet I was still. I couldn't speak, couldn't move to let others know but I saw you. You were with me, for that small moment and the greatest relief I had that night was not being found by Toby but realizing that you weren't actually there. If anything ever happened…
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: During Ep In the Shadow of Two Gunmen Pt 2
Why not?
Who was that girl? Coming back from a meeting today, I found a young blonde girl answering my phone. After a brief conversation it seems she had taken it upon herself to appoint herself as my assistant. I immediately recognized her refugee status. She was fleeing a bad relationship, a free riding medical student. Still I felt nothing but annoyance, I wanted her gone, I had things to do. In a hope of dismissing her, I told her this place was no rebuilding platform for people, no confidence Oprah Winfrey embrace session – well I hope I was more eloquent than that. I figured she'd been gone, either embarrassed or shocked, best result: both. She turned to me, and with the fiercest blue eyes and streak of spirit I have seen, she asked me why? Why it couldn't be a place to start a new? And I knew she was completely right. This fresh as a daisy, Wisconsin raised (I won't think about that), plucky student, stood in my office and convinced me with one sentence what this campaign should be about.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The Midterms
You made fun of the rules.
I love that you protect me.
Even if it's from myself, you put yourself in people's faces who would ordinarily scare others. You stayed with me, for three months and let time help me through. No kid gloves or special treatment, you respected for who I am and how I process things.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The Lame Duck Congress
I'm a beard.
I love that you see in small things a heart.
The most inconsequential, low ranking report can spark your interest and instead of dismissal, you see people. Names and faces, people and their suffering, and you take the truth of what the White House stands for and want to help. All the while knowing, that little can be done with the little that with we have, but also knowing that you are not the person who should decide what equals a greater pain. Even if it's pinching!
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The Portland Trip
Because I say so.
I love that dress.
I spent hours after you left, staring at my desk. Piles of work glared back at me but nothing. I couldn't escape how my breath caught in my throat when I saw you properly for the first time, how the entire night my mind wondered what you were doing, how utterly relieved I was when you came back unsatisfied. But what, more than anything troubled me was my conversation with Matt Skinner. He was advocating a bill that would basically declare certain types of love lawful and others not. It wasn't the gay community that I thought about, but selfishly myself. I have no capacity of understanding, to process what would happen if someone forbid me to love you. While silence and secrecy prevail, I know one day, I will tell you. Heaven help anyone, government or individual if they told me my love was illegal.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep Noel
I'm tuned to you.
I love that you guessed.
I was drowning, and I could see no escape, and felt foolish to ask for help. The sirens would continue ringing, and my breath was shallow and I was back there, sitting alone. How could I ask for help? But you saw something. Was it that I couldn't look at you? For fear of falling apart. Was it my terse responses? An attempt to redirect my anger, from myself to others. Was it the blood that flowed from my hand? You saw it and said nothing to me, but somehow you knew. In the darkness that was closing in, you reached out to me, gently showing me the light. You saved me and for that I am eternally grateful.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The Leadership Breakfast
She sent a note.
I love your embarrassment.
The sheer look of horror was priceless. I laughed for days and in no means at you. A more sympathetic laugh, for your ability to get into the most preposterous situations yet still retain a sensibility about you.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep The War at Home
You fired me twice already tonight--I'm impervious.
I love your misdirection.
I know the feeling, and while denying it vehmently to anyone who ever mentions it in my presence, I know the feeling. What makes it incredible is the possibility that Joey's right. That the number one pollster in the country may have correctly counted a poll that was never taken. How do you manage? Do you struggle daily as I do? For your sake, I hope not - for my own, I hope so.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep 17 People
Stop remembering that.
I love that you left him.
While I may mock you, I may mock him and make light of the entire event, you should never doubt how proud I am of you. For being brave enough to leave him, for being brave enough to come back to me. For being brave enough to recently tell me the truth. To this very day, I will never understand how someone could focus on anything with you in the hospital. Minor scrap or not, I simply don't believe it possible. No red light would stop me either, is what I wanted to reply. If only…
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep Bad Moon Rising
AA's definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
I love your reasoning.
You look at situations and often pick an unpopular choice and ask why? Asking questions that while help prove my point, many people shy away from asking. Congressman, lobbyists, economists – many wanted to ask me the same question you asked today but you were the only one brave enough to say it. To not be afraid to be wrong, just wanting to know why? Wanting a reason.
To: Donna Moss
From Josh Lyman (Personal Folder)
Date: Post Ep 18th & Potomac
If everybody out there takes it the way she did, we may be okay.
I love your response.
Everyone felt betrayed, hurt, and lied to. You felt compassion, sorrow and love. Your only thoughts were for the President and how he felt, how this would affect him. How amazingly selfless you are, to not focus on what may come for you. How this terrible lie could have you jobless in mere months. I learn so much from you every day and can never acknowledge it. Today I learnt from you what it meant to be a human being first and political operative second.
West Wing Fan Fiction: Did You Know?
Title: Did You Know?
Author Note: A dual narrative little piece about what Donna and Josh were really thinking during Donna's terrible interview with Josh for a position in the Santos team.
Author Note 2: This was never published in the fan-fiction community.
Did you know?
How hard it was to walk in with my head held high. To walk through five hundred people, many guessing my reasons for being there, many if not most making assumptions about you and I. For me to walk into that building and retain any sense of pride was difficult enough, and then you appeared in the doorway. I was for a moment transported back to New Hampshire, preparing to beg for a job, but this was different, it had to be.
Did you know?
I spent most of the morning distracted, agitated. I studied the file hourly, trying to excuse the many statements, mentally preparing how to defend hiring you. But there was nothing I could say that would justify it to myself or my colleagues and all I could do was wait.
Did you know?
How hard it was for me to launch into my resume, always knowing it would never be enough. I could see it in your eyes the moment I clasped my hands together. What filled me with equal parts joy and disappointment was that there wasn’t pity in your eyes, there was sadness. Regret and remorse. And I felt it surge through me, but hoping bravado would sweep it aside I pushed ahead.
Did you know?
How proud I was that you have grown? I wanted to tell you that more than anything but as it has always been, I could never find the words. You sat in front of me, in another campaign almost eight years later, a completely different woman and yet it was the strongest sense of déjà vu I’ve ever experienced.
Did you know?
It was the longest silence in my life. My pitch over, my plea awaiting a response, there was silence that deafened the room. Could you hear it? At that moment, I wanted to say it’s not about the job, it’s about you. Proximity to you.
Did you know?
I felt like an executioner, the file was so hot in my hands. Politically this was right thing to do, personally I could barely speak the words. What continued to run through my mind, as I read aloud your quotes, was my mistake. How could I have been so involved to not notice how brilliant and talented and driven you were? To be so self-obsessed that you were forced to find some one who would believe in you, when from the moment I met you, I’ve believed in only dreams of beauty for you Donna.
Did you know?
I was humiliated. Mortified and not about what I’d said, because it was my job and I stand by it, but it was that you were right. You won and I had nothing that superseded that. So in a split moment of stupidity I attempted to regain ground. Suggesting you were afraid of my authority was the second best idiotic moment of my life, the first was quitting my job without giving you proper reason.
Did you know?
I slipped. I hadn’t meant to say it, but seeing you at my desk, asking for another chance, how could you not know? How could you sit there and think that every day and even many more before you left, I spent countless minutes and hours missing you. Missing something we never had.
Did you know?
I slipped. My voice broke and I couldn’t look at you anymore for fear of imploding. The chance to be near you again moved away and I felt the grief rushing toward me, I could barely be cordial enough to thank you for your time.
Author Note: A dual narrative little piece about what Donna and Josh were really thinking during Donna's terrible interview with Josh for a position in the Santos team.
Author Note 2: This was never published in the fan-fiction community.
Did you know?
How hard it was to walk in with my head held high. To walk through five hundred people, many guessing my reasons for being there, many if not most making assumptions about you and I. For me to walk into that building and retain any sense of pride was difficult enough, and then you appeared in the doorway. I was for a moment transported back to New Hampshire, preparing to beg for a job, but this was different, it had to be.
Did you know?
I spent most of the morning distracted, agitated. I studied the file hourly, trying to excuse the many statements, mentally preparing how to defend hiring you. But there was nothing I could say that would justify it to myself or my colleagues and all I could do was wait.
Did you know?
How hard it was for me to launch into my resume, always knowing it would never be enough. I could see it in your eyes the moment I clasped my hands together. What filled me with equal parts joy and disappointment was that there wasn’t pity in your eyes, there was sadness. Regret and remorse. And I felt it surge through me, but hoping bravado would sweep it aside I pushed ahead.
Did you know?
How proud I was that you have grown? I wanted to tell you that more than anything but as it has always been, I could never find the words. You sat in front of me, in another campaign almost eight years later, a completely different woman and yet it was the strongest sense of déjà vu I’ve ever experienced.
Did you know?
It was the longest silence in my life. My pitch over, my plea awaiting a response, there was silence that deafened the room. Could you hear it? At that moment, I wanted to say it’s not about the job, it’s about you. Proximity to you.
Did you know?
I felt like an executioner, the file was so hot in my hands. Politically this was right thing to do, personally I could barely speak the words. What continued to run through my mind, as I read aloud your quotes, was my mistake. How could I have been so involved to not notice how brilliant and talented and driven you were? To be so self-obsessed that you were forced to find some one who would believe in you, when from the moment I met you, I’ve believed in only dreams of beauty for you Donna.
Did you know?
I was humiliated. Mortified and not about what I’d said, because it was my job and I stand by it, but it was that you were right. You won and I had nothing that superseded that. So in a split moment of stupidity I attempted to regain ground. Suggesting you were afraid of my authority was the second best idiotic moment of my life, the first was quitting my job without giving you proper reason.
Did you know?
I slipped. I hadn’t meant to say it, but seeing you at my desk, asking for another chance, how could you not know? How could you sit there and think that every day and even many more before you left, I spent countless minutes and hours missing you. Missing something we never had.
Did you know?
I slipped. My voice broke and I couldn’t look at you anymore for fear of imploding. The chance to be near you again moved away and I felt the grief rushing toward me, I could barely be cordial enough to thank you for your time.
West Wing Fan Fiction: Cold Calling
Title: Cold Calling
Author: Published as Finn AUS
Disclaimer: You know they aren’t mine, but if wishing made it so.
Rating: Very safe.
Category: Comedy-ish
Author Note: This tiny baby piece that takes places after the key debacle of 06. A completely different way Josh could have handled it.
A/N 2: It’s been a while between drinks and I just found this on my computer, I haven’t even sent it off to my beloved beta (sorry for all the mistakes), I’m just putting it out there.
Feedback: Oh please yes
'SAM!!’ he yelled into the phone. Pacing back and forth across the lobby foyer, Josh was frantic. He needed a sure hand, some words of wisdom and the only person he knew he could completely trust at that moment was Sam.
'SAM PICK UP!’ Again, begging for him to be there. A short scuffle down the line and then a breathless Sam answered.
'Josh?’ Clearly Sam was confused.
‘Yeah, it’s me.’
‘Are you okay?’
'Not really.’
‘Okay, take deep breaths, lean against a wall and I’m going to call Donna on the other line to get Stanley Keyworth’s number-’
‘Don’t call Donna!’ Josh snapped.
‘Josh, you sound terrible and she can help-’
‘We kissed.’ Silence followed.
‘Sam? Hey, Sam are you still there?’
‘Are you okay?’
‘What?’
‘I just thought when you two finally kissed, you might spontaneously combust or something.’
‘No, I managed to keep myself together. What do you mean finally?’
‘You’re not seriously asking that?’
‘I am.’
‘Because Josh, you two have been a kiss away for years.’
‘Why didn’t anyone tell me this?’ Josh whined.
‘Sorry buddy I thought you knew, it is, after all Donna.’
‘Yeah,’ he sighed.
‘Was it worth the wait?’ Sam softly asked.
‘Oh yeah,’ he smiled at the memory.
‘So, what’s the problem, what have you done?’
‘What do you mean, what have I done?’ he asked, mildly offended.
‘Josh,’ Sam intoned.
‘Fine…there may have been a miscommunication.’
‘And?’
‘Donna may now believe that I am rejecting her advances.’
‘How did you manage mis-communicate that?’ Sam was shocked
‘She tried, in an incredibly sexy manoeuvre by the way, to slide me her room key across the table tonight. One of the idiot people I have hired grabbed it before I could, offering to return it to her.’
‘And?’
‘And what Sam? Donna now thinks I sent the key back and I don’t want to continue the kiss.’
‘Josh you really are an idiot sometimes.’
‘Thanks Sam for all the support. What am I going to do?’ He jumped impatiently on the spot.
‘Call her, get her room number from the hotel, email her, fax her, page her…there are about five hundred ways you can contact her and explain the mix up.’
‘Really…I should just call her?’
‘You should do it right now…I have no idea why you are still talking to me! For someone so bright you really are quite stupid.’
‘Sam, I’m about to call the woman I’ve spent eight long years loving, give me a confidence boost would ya?’
‘Do you love her?’ Sam whispered in an awed reverence.
‘Sorry buddy, thought you knew, it is, after all Donna,’ Josh smiled.
Author: Published as Finn AUS
Disclaimer: You know they aren’t mine, but if wishing made it so.
Rating: Very safe.
Category: Comedy-ish
Author Note: This tiny baby piece that takes places after the key debacle of 06. A completely different way Josh could have handled it.
A/N 2: It’s been a while between drinks and I just found this on my computer, I haven’t even sent it off to my beloved beta (sorry for all the mistakes), I’m just putting it out there.
Feedback: Oh please yes
'SAM!!’ he yelled into the phone. Pacing back and forth across the lobby foyer, Josh was frantic. He needed a sure hand, some words of wisdom and the only person he knew he could completely trust at that moment was Sam.
'SAM PICK UP!’ Again, begging for him to be there. A short scuffle down the line and then a breathless Sam answered.
'Josh?’ Clearly Sam was confused.
‘Yeah, it’s me.’
‘Are you okay?’
'Not really.’
‘Okay, take deep breaths, lean against a wall and I’m going to call Donna on the other line to get Stanley Keyworth’s number-’
‘Don’t call Donna!’ Josh snapped.
‘Josh, you sound terrible and she can help-’
‘We kissed.’ Silence followed.
‘Sam? Hey, Sam are you still there?’
‘Are you okay?’
‘What?’
‘I just thought when you two finally kissed, you might spontaneously combust or something.’
‘No, I managed to keep myself together. What do you mean finally?’
‘You’re not seriously asking that?’
‘I am.’
‘Because Josh, you two have been a kiss away for years.’
‘Why didn’t anyone tell me this?’ Josh whined.
‘Sorry buddy I thought you knew, it is, after all Donna.’
‘Yeah,’ he sighed.
‘Was it worth the wait?’ Sam softly asked.
‘Oh yeah,’ he smiled at the memory.
‘So, what’s the problem, what have you done?’
‘What do you mean, what have I done?’ he asked, mildly offended.
‘Josh,’ Sam intoned.
‘Fine…there may have been a miscommunication.’
‘And?’
‘Donna may now believe that I am rejecting her advances.’
‘How did you manage mis-communicate that?’ Sam was shocked
‘She tried, in an incredibly sexy manoeuvre by the way, to slide me her room key across the table tonight. One of the idiot people I have hired grabbed it before I could, offering to return it to her.’
‘And?’
‘And what Sam? Donna now thinks I sent the key back and I don’t want to continue the kiss.’
‘Josh you really are an idiot sometimes.’
‘Thanks Sam for all the support. What am I going to do?’ He jumped impatiently on the spot.
‘Call her, get her room number from the hotel, email her, fax her, page her…there are about five hundred ways you can contact her and explain the mix up.’
‘Really…I should just call her?’
‘You should do it right now…I have no idea why you are still talking to me! For someone so bright you really are quite stupid.’
‘Sam, I’m about to call the woman I’ve spent eight long years loving, give me a confidence boost would ya?’
‘Do you love her?’ Sam whispered in an awed reverence.
‘Sorry buddy, thought you knew, it is, after all Donna,’ Josh smiled.
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